Jess Ekstrom: The Arrival Fallacy Will Break You

Negotiate Anything

American Negotiation Institute

Business, Self-improvement, Education

4.7 • 747 Ratings

🗓️ 5 May 2026

⏱️ 75 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

We don't get dopamine at the finish line — we get it in the chase. Which means every goal you're killing yourself to reach is quietly wired to disappoint you the moment you arrive. Jess Ekstrom found this out the hard way. She scaled Headbands of Hope to millions in revenue, got acquired, hit the Inc. 500 — and felt nothing within minutes. Her new book, Making It Without Losing It, is the framework she built from the wreckage of that realization. Connect with Jess jessekstrom.com Buy the Book Making it Without Losing It by Jess Ekstrom Contact ANI ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow Kwame Christian on LinkedIn⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠negotiateanything.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Click here to buy your copy of Finding Confidence in Conflict: How to Negotiate Anything and Live Your Best Life!

Transcript

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0:00.0	I just got the Inc. 500.
0:01.8	Nice.
0:02.6	Female founder.
0:03.4	Exactly my reaction.
0:04.8	Cool.
0:05.5	Five minutes later, I was like, well, that didn't solve all my problems.
0:09.2	Here we go.
0:10.1	To the next thing.
0:11.6	Not to say that those things shouldn't be like celebrated, applauded, and not to say
0:16.2	that you shouldn't want those things.
0:18.0	But if they are like your primary driving force, then it's probably
0:24.1	knowledge to receive that you're going after things based on how they look instead of how
0:29.7	they feel. If you still would go after it with no one knowing, then it's a really good
0:34.3	indicator that you're like compass is well calibrated.
0:38.7	Go for it.
0:40.5	You're not where you want to be yet.
0:42.7	And somewhere in the back of your head, there's a voice that says,
0:45.8	once I get there, I'll finally be okay.
0:48.6	But what if that voice is actually the problem?
0:51.5	Jess Extram built two companies, wrote two books, and learned the hard way that none
0:56.0	of it feels the way that you think it will, until you change the goal.
1:00.3	She built her first company, Headbands of Hope, from $0 to millions in revenue, and her
	...

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