Welcome to Nobody Told Me. I'm Jan Black.

And I'm Laura Owens.

Have you ever found yourself frustrated in a disagreement with someone you love?

Have you ever wished you

had better skills in terms of handling arguments? Would you like to see something positive result

from the negativity of a fight? Our guest on this episode, James L. Creighton, is here to help.

James is a psychologist and relationship consultant whose latest book is called Loving Through Your

Differences, Building Strong Relationships from Separate Realities.

Thank you so much for joining us today.

Good to be with you.

So what inspired you to write this book?

Well, most couples fight, and some couples fight a little, some fight a lot, and my wife

and I were kind of on the

fight a lot, end of the scale.

And so we've been working our entire marriage at finding things that help us bridge the gap

and so on.

We're 53 years and rolling still, so I guess we're going to make it.

You've done something right, I guess.

Well, when you talk about fighting and that you were on the spectrum, rolling still, so I guess we're going to make it. You've done something right, I guess.

Well, when you talk about fighting and that you were on the spectrum of fighting more than most couples you think, is that a good thing or a bad thing?

I think the real issue is how you handle the fights when you have them.

Fighting a lot can be a dangerous thing or fighting a lot can be an okay thing if when you do fight,

...