JACKIE'S BIRTHDAY BASHFEST.

Bitch Bible

PodcastOne

Talk Radio, Comedy, Society & Culture

4.6 • 14.6K Ratings

🗓️ 20 August 2024

⏱️ 74 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

As a gift to herself, Jackie discusses people, places and things she irrationally hates for over an hour. Thank you for supporting my sponsors! Addyi: You can talk to your doctor about Addyi or have an online telehealth appointment at www.addyi.com CBDistillery: Use code BITCHBIBLE for 20% off at www.CBDistillery.com GDefy: Enjoy a special summer offer of $20 off your order of $100 or more with code "Bible" at www.gdefy.com Mixhers: Use promo code BITCHBIBLE at checkout for an additional 10% off your order at www.MixHers.com/BITCHBIBLE Noom: Sign up for your trial today at www.Noom.com Nutrafol: Get $10 off your first month's subscription and free shipping when you enter the promo code BIBLE at www.Nutrafol.com Pretty Litter: Save 20% on your first order and get a free cat toy at www.PrettyLitter.com/bible

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hello everybody and welcome to a very special episode of the
0:19.8	Bitch rival podcast. For the ill-informed, I would like to currently remind you that my
0:27.6	birthday was this Sunday, August 18th, 818, 818 till I die baby.
0:35.0	And shockingly enough, I'm not a huge birthday person.
0:41.0	I know it sounds like a lie and incredibly off-brand for me, but I live with the life
0:47.6	philosophy that every day is my fucking birthday, you know? So just one measly day out of the year, not special.
0:57.0	Birthdays are quite literally the least special thing on the planet because
1:01.2	everyone and everything has one. So in honor of my trip around the
1:09.5	sun, which is a whole other problem that we will discuss.
1:12.6	People say, another year around the sun,
1:14.8	like nobody cares, Kelsey, not one person.
1:18.1	I believe that there are two types of people in this world.
1:24.0	Okay, people who are birthday people and people who are not birthday people.
1:29.6	People who think that hate is a strong word and people who think that hating things is you know a way of life, a beautiful untethered joy, really, and ultimately
1:51.0	freeing.
1:52.8	Imagine living in the mental purgatory of forbidding yourself natural reactions to things. I literally cannot stop thinking about a woman that I
2:07.4	encountered in 2018 at the reboot Charlie's Angels Matinee starring Kristen Stewart and two other
2:15.9	bitches I don't know who they are and as I sat to enjoy a gorgeous solo matinee
2:22.0	there was a woman sitting next to me with a cross-body bag who
2:25.1	ordered a cheese plate and a ceramist. And she said,
2:31.3	ceramist. Do you guys have Sarah Mist here?
2:35.0	When I tell you I think about it every single day of my life,
	...

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