This message comes from how to be a better human, a podcast from TED.

Even if you're a self-help skeptic, you'll find inspiration to improve your life from fascinating

in-depth conversations with TED speakers. Find how to be a better human wherever you listen.

Hello, hello. I'm Brittany Luce, and you're listening to It's Been a Minute from NPR, a show about what's going on in culture and why it doesn't happen by accident.

I want to know. Have you seen this man?

The guy who you might see drinking a macho latte

and reading a Sally Rooney paperback at your local cafe

and a very front-facing sidewalk table.

You know who I'm talking about, the performative male.

He's the tote back carrying, indie music-loving, bell hooks quoting Gen Z man, so memeified

that there have been performative male dress-up contests, style guides, and a lot of criticism about who he is,

what he does, and why he does it. It's a little strange to me to be like, like, I can't enjoy

a pretty little drink or like chipped black nail polish without it being painted as like

a tactic of manipulation. I'm like, maybe we should think deeper about

what that implies. And that criticism that these guys are just being manipulative, it's coming

from a group you might not expect. Politically progressive women. Many have argued that the

performative male persona is all for show, just a ruse to attract left-leaning partners, that these men couldn't possibly be doing all of this because they actually want to.

I mean, look, I imagine, as with every other time in history, there are always at least a few people out there trying to con their way into a date.

But what does it mean that that's the

overwhelming assumption? I am concerned about this downstream effect that if a man is reading

a book at a bar, that it has to be performative. And I'm afraid that these kinds of trends could

drive people away from kind of the healthier expressions of masculinity.

...