God separately told both of us to not date anyone. And it was at the very time the she and I started

getting really cool. The problem was we started catching feelings about six months into that commandment.

And we're like, well, this isn't dating? We have my homies, Alexis and Brian Cole.

Hey. Long story short, there was another friend in the friend group that I started dating.

That didn't work out.

Did you have a rule in your mind that you wouldn't date your friend's ex?

Yes, I would like to clarify before I get came for in the comment.

Let's talk a little bit about the cold.

When you talk about what you could have thwarted is a 10-year marriage, the kids that

you have, the stories y'all have, building legacy together because of a loyalty at 19 years.

Do you even hang around that girl now? Yeah. Exactly. Y'all started holding hands too long,

and then y'all became boyfriend and girlfriend. Yeah, we had a hiccup. We call it the Valley.

We were both virgins when we met. We wanted so bad to be pure. We both had purity rings. When we had sex. Yeah. I was like the poster child for Christianity in my church. So many prophecies were said about my life and so much of it was around being a virgin. And now my identity is tied to something that's action-based. I found myself saying

my entire purpose, identity, everything I was called on this earth to do is now void because of one act.

And I started tailspending and I said, I can't do this right now. I don't even know how to do this

right now because I don't know who I am anymore. How did you say that to her? Probably not well. Right after that, I felt like we got hate with other things. That's when the whole Trayvon Martin conversation came in, and we were talking about that. There is a crossroads that white people come to. When it comes to the conversation of race, I can choose to acknowledge for my entire life, have not thought about this the right way. When you come to

that admission, you have to go back and think, how many people have I hurt with the wrong mindset?

And how do I, as a husband, cover her if I don't know what I'm covering her from? That doesn't

even make sense. What is something that you believe that people really don't understand about

y'all what started as a search

for understanding became a journey of transformation every letter that i wrote led me to this day

the day i got married.

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