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The Gray Area with Sean Illing

In defense of fatherhood

The Gray Area with Sean Illing

Vox Media Podcast Network

Politics, News, Society & Culture, News Commentary, Philosophy

4.511.1K Ratings

🗓️ 1 May 2026

⏱️ 42 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Everyone says having kids changes your life. That’s true. But it’s not the whole story. Sean talks with author Derek Thompson about fatherhood, how raising kids can shock you, and why parenting feels not so much “hard” as “nonstop.” They explore the weird psychology of loving something more than yourself, the loss of control over your own time, and the bittersweet realization that every moment with your child is already slipping away. Also: why two kids is not just twice the work, and why you might still want to get on the ride anyway. Host: Sean Illing (@seanilling)  Guest: Derek Thompson (@DKThomp) We would love to hear from you. To tell us what you thought of this episode, email us at thegrayarea@vox.com or leave us a voicemail at 1-800-214-5749. Your comments and questions help us make a better show. And you can watch new episodes of The Gray Area on YouTube. New episodes drop every Monday and Friday. Listen to The Gray Area ad-free by becoming a Vox Member: vox.com/members. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

What to Make of a Life is the new book from Jim Collins, best-selling author of Good to Great.

0:07.0

Based on 10 years of research, What to Make of a Life offers transformative teachings on what it takes to navigate your way through periods of fog,

0:15.2

make it past life's inevitable cliffs, and keep the inner fire burning bright, long, and late.

0:21.5

Step into frame with What to Make of a Life, the Instant New York Times bestseller by Jim

0:26.3

Collins, available from Harper Edge wherever books are sold.

0:33.8

Support for this show comes from Odu.

0:36.6

Running a business is hard enough,

0:38.9

so why make it harder with a dozen different apps that don't talk to each other?

0:43.2

Introducing Odu.

0:44.6

It's the only business software you'll ever need.

0:47.5

It's an all-in-one fully integrated platform that makes your work easier,

0:52.1

CRM, accounting, inventory, e-commerce, and more.

0:55.7

And the best part, O-DU replaces multiple expensive platforms

0:59.2

for a fraction of the cost.

1:01.4

That's why over thousands of businesses have made the switch.

1:04.7

So why not you?

1:06.0

Try O-D-O-4-free at O-D-O-O-O-O-com.

1:11.4

Derek Thompson, welcome to the show. Hey, great to be here. Derek was a longtime staff writer at The Atlantic, and he's the co-author, most recently, of the, at this point, super-duper mega bestseller abundance.

1:37.9

He's now the author of a relentlessly interesting substack, which you should check out.

1:43.2

And it is on that substack that he wrote

1:45.9

a lovely reflection on fatherhood, which is what we're going to talk about today. So,

1:53.4

fatherhood, Derek, overrated or underrated? Well, certainly rated. Everyone has something to say about

...

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