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The Bert Show

If She Fails To Hit The Gym We’re Putting Her On The Cover Of A Magazine!

The Bert Show

The Bert Show

News, Entertainment News, Society & Culture, Comedy

4.14.4K Ratings

🗓️ 7 March 2025

⏱️ 12 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

She's being held accountable! If she fails to keep up with her strength training, we're putting her on the cover of a magazine! How's it going Kristin?

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Transcript

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0:00.0

The Bert Show.

0:01.3

Kristen made a promise to herself about her health this year and she is dragging one of you in with her.

0:07.3

That is such a lie. I did not make a promise to myself. You put me in the hot seat and I had no other choice to take accountability for my actions because you were tired of hearing me bemoan about strength training and how weak I was and that I didn't want to sweat when I work out.

0:22.4

And so then you brought in Joanne from Simply Buckhead and they were like, hey, if you don't

0:27.2

start working out, we're going to put your butt on the cover of a magazine because that's what

0:30.5

Abby threw out there. If you don't do strength training once a week, we're going to put you

0:33.6

on the cover of a magazine. So now all of a sudden, I'm not only responsible for my own

0:37.8

health, but also an article in simply Buckhead magazine. And now we're dragging a listener into this

0:42.3

because I want to make her my accountability buddy. This has snowballed and it's out of control and

0:46.8

it's too much pressure. Kristen became the friend that was complaining about the same thing over

0:50.9

and over and over again and not doing anything about it. So I'm finally like, look, either do something about it or shut up. So now we are doing something about it. We are doing

0:58.8

something about it. So here's the deal. I have been going to a place called stat wellness. And they

1:04.9

have been doing some body analysis. And what Bert is referencing is a year ago, my nurse practitioner, Jackie, said I needed to start

1:13.2

incorporating strength training because when I did my body analysis, basically what it showed

1:17.1

is I'm weak a.F, okay? Like, I need to work on my muscles. And unbeknownst to me, that's very

1:24.3

important for women, for longevity, and not just for longevity, but to live

1:29.4

better longer. And that was news to me, because I'm like, oh, I do yoga twice a week. That

1:34.5

should be enough. But now that I'm a woman of a certain age, that age being 45, and the fact that

1:39.6

I'm tweaking my back every time I pick up my child, it has become a parent that I do need to get more

1:45.3

strength. So this was a year ago. A year passes and I downloaded the app, Bert has suggested,

1:53.0

FitBod. Which burns some calories. Downloading the app? Yeah. However, I never opened it once and

1:58.5

I didn't do it. So for an entire year, I did no strength training whatsoever.

...

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