So I'm pretty. I know that may be a weird thing to say out loud, but I think it's an important one to acknowledge. And I'm going to tell you why in this episode of hard feelings.

Whoa, I don't know why I got so presentational there.

I've never done that.

Anyway, here we go.

Yeah. So I feel like, you know, every kid starts thinking about their appearance kind of just in the cusp of puberty, maybe a little earlier. But I started even earlier than that because I was in an industry that is so hyper fixated and obsessed with the appearance of children, which is every bit as creepy as it sounds. I went out for a lot of roles.

I went out for beauty pageant contestants and, you know, little, you know, daughters of

famous and very attractive, the actors and actresses.

I had my fair share of that stuff.

I also went out for roles

like, you know, a homely looking girl. But you can't separate those things when you're little.

You can't go like, oh, well, I'm also going out for the beauty queen. So instead, it's just like you

see the word homely. And you just think like, oh, so I guess I'm not, I'm not

pretty. Like that's the conclusion that you draw as a kid. And not to mention, you know,

you're in rooms with the literal prettiest people, prettiest children, the hottest children on

earth because that's what, again, Hollywood is.

So I'm, you know, I'm a kid. I'm not able to differentiate any of that. I'm not able to discern.

I don't know the difference. So I just kind of get this messaging that I'm not attractive.

On top of this, the thing that I think made it worst of all was nobody's

going to be surprised. My mom's messaging. My mom made me wear crest white strips. She put

highlights in my hair from a very early age, tinted my eyelashes. Everything kind of felt like,

you know, it'd be a reach to call that hygiene or upkeeper self-care when the kids fucking seven, right?

Like, that's not right. There's a time and a place for that. If you want to start doing that in your teen,

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