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Therapy Gecko

"I'M A REAL PRIVATE DETECTIVE"

Therapy Gecko

iHeartPodcasts

Comedy, Society & Culture, Philosophy, Comedy Interviews

4.91K Ratings

🗓️ 1 June 2022

⏱️ 79 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

A caller tells me she just started a new job as a private investigator for hire, which is basically legally paying someone to stalk a person for you. The caller tells me about the stakeouts she’s been on, how she got the job, her disguises, the various ways it’s possible to screw up, and more. It’s real life Sherlock Holmes. Then we hear from a man who is worried about his wife finding out that he likes to wear women’s clothing, a woman who has been seeing an extremely shady man that she met on Tinder, and a caller who feels like they are emotionally invested in sports to a point where it’s a major problem in their life. This was a good one. Don't take my word for it though. Check it out yourself. I am a gecko.

Transcript

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0:00.0

Hello?

0:00.6

Hi.

0:01.2

Uh, is this Alex?

0:04.6

It is.

0:07.2

What is going on with you, dog?

0:10.6

I just opened some sieve. What about you, dog? Oh, and I have a Madello.

0:18.0

Uh, is, sieve is like civilization like the video game right?

0:24.8

Yeah, have you played it?

0:27.2

I have I don't really have the patience for games like that because I feel like

0:31.6

Civ is a is a commitment like I don't I don't do any entertainment thing that's a commitment

0:37.5

like I won't even watch a movie because I know I'm in it for an hour and a half and a game of sieve I mean that's like three days right how long is the game of sieve last it is yeah I mean they can go on for a really one time I'm on the second day.

0:53.4

I've been invited by friends before to play Dungeons and Dragons and that's just my worst

0:58.3

fucking nightmare because it's um I mean that's a whole commitment.

1:03.8

You know, I want to say, I'm going to say this real thing about Dungeons and Dragons real quick

1:06.7

because I don't know why I need to get this out there.

1:09.5

A lot of the times in Dungeons and Dragons, like when, like, I've been with my friends and I, we've like talked about putting again together and they're like, we need somebody who's, like knows a lot about the game in our group that they can like

1:25.2

guide us through it. Does that make sense? You're playing Dungeons and Dragons? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I

1:30.4

I actually have it, but I really want to. But I think that that's not what you want you want you don't want anyone in the

1:37.1

group who knows what they're talking about because then that person's just gonna be

1:40.8

running everything you I want to play Dungeons and Dragons with a group of people

1:44.1

where nobody knows what they're doing.

1:46.8

And that feels like it's more fun than having one guy be like,

...

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