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Hello, welcome to the program. Yes. Oh my god. I can't believe I'm talking to you. I have admired you for so many years. I think you're just fantastic and I'm going to get right to the point because I know you like people to get right to the point. Okay. I turn I turn 50 today and I can't believe it, but I'm still.

I have this expectation that I am going to hear from my mother who we've been estranged from each other for over 15 years because I decided that I was no longer going to live with the lie and her.

I'm not believing the lie was that my stepfather who she was still married to when we stopped talking sexually abused me at 15 and she stayed married to him. She knew that he sexually abused you and what did she say to you?

She said, well, I know is that he he apologized and he's sorry that he wrestled with you. And then it was never spoken of again. And in the meantime, I actually what did he actually do?

He held me up against the door from behind. He's a big man and he felt my breath and he felt my crotch area and then he held me tight so I couldn't get my hands free.

He took one of my hands bent it behind my back to stroke his penis.

And your mother thought that one night, friendly wrestling. And when you said it wasn't wrestling, he groped me. She said what?

Yes, she said, I can't believe that. I remember that night. She sat in my room all night long in the rocking chair next to my bed saying over and over again.

I just don't believe he did that. I think there's I think you're imagining it. I think there's something wrong with you. And I just I couldn't I said, fine, mom, fine, fine, fine.

Did you report this school to the counselor or anything?

No, I because at the time I didn't know I could do that.

Okay. So what can I help you with today? It's your birthday. I can say Happy Birthday off key to you. What else?

Yes, thank you, Dr. Lary. You're just so great. Well, I think I'm pretty level headed person since then. Yes, I've done counseling through the years.

And I know how you feel about counseling. And I think you're kind of right about that in some respects. But I want to release let go of the sect that expectation that, oh gosh,

of all days on my 50th birthday, you would think this is the time that she would come to her senses and go, oh my God, I am so sorry.

And I feel my life is pretty. It's only it's only once a year on your birthday. You have this fantasy?

No, honey. It's it's a lot. It's a lot. I mean, it's it comes and goes. It comes and goes.

Okay, it's not going to happen. But today I know. No, you don't know. I know you know, I don't know.

You know, you get a egg at a sperm that come together and it develops in some woman's belly.

It doesn't mean it's in a good person's belly.

Your mother is not a good person.

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