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#IMOMSOHARD

I COLD CUTS STOMACH SO HARD

#IMOMSOHARD

Pionaire Podcasting

Society & Culture, Comedy, Kids & Family, Parenting, Personal Journals

4.92.2K Ratings

🗓️ 17 February 2026

⏱️ 34 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

This week we're catching up on dentist appointments, chaperoning field trips, and hosting our relatives for the weekend... the way we're getting through it? Eating cold cut sandwiches in bed. 

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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Do you, I feel like there's just people in your life that you always are bad in front of.

0:05.9

And it's me and my orthodontist.

0:07.9

I can't get it the fuck right.

0:10.2

And sometimes it's his fault.

0:11.6

And sometimes it's my fault.

0:13.1

But all the time, it's fucking contentious.

0:15.8

And I also hate my pediatrician.

0:17.9

Look, I know what you're saying.

0:19.0

You're like, she gets into it with doctors a lot.

0:21.0

You're right.

0:32.0

Just grab that red wine that's behind you.

0:35.2

We are recording.

0:36.1

Big shout out to Casey, who's helping us remotely from New York. She's freaking exhausted, I'm sure.

0:41.9

Yeah. Late in the day, you guys, we haven't even, Kristen and I haven't gotten a chance to catch up.

0:47.9

We need you to go rate, review, subscribe, keep this podcast on the rails. Also, come out and see us

0:54.0

live. We're having a lot of fun. Yes. Can I tell you one of the rails. Also, come out and see us live.

0:54.3

We're having a lot of fun.

0:56.0

Yes. Can I tell you one of the things? Oh, man. I will get to this. We have a lot. We've been on the road for almost like 10 days, but it's really like 11 or 12, all things considered. We were home for 36 hours. Then we went to the very cold. We went to Bloomington, Waukegan, and Madison.

1:11.3

Right.

1:11.7

Where we realized, we are giant pussies.

1:14.7

Will you? Then we went to the very cold. We went to Bloomington, Waukegan, and Madison. Right. Where we realized, we are giant pussies when it comes to the cold. Oh, my gosh, we cannot take the cold. I was a bitch. I was too. But I determined mine was from the gray, I think. I just got outside and I was like, what kind of bullshit is?

2:17.8

This is not even. And then everybody's so nice. I'm like, you're just better people than us. I did, where was the coldest place? Madison. Okay, that's where I really felt it. Yeah. The other places I was like, oh, okay, but my coat was like a sleeping bag and it really worked out. my heating blanket and it was worth having a second piece of luggage. If you don't travel with a heated blanket, you're just to feel. I don't know what you're doing. Chris and I would be in shows going, we're going to get to have our woobies. We can't go be in our whoopies. We're going to do eye mask and foot masks and watch murder in our whobies. Yeah. And it's delightful. We feel like we're getting away with something because we're going to go party with the ladies and then we get to go under our heated blankets like old ass. Oh, my God. Which brings me to how behind I am today, which when I got back, I should have gone to the grocery store.

...

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