How To Write Your Memoir

How To! with Mike Pesca

Peach Fish Projects

Education, How To

4.3 • 2K Ratings

🗓️ 25 March 2025

⏱️ 43 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

To some, the act of writing a memoir might seem daunting, invasive, or navel-gazing. But excavating memories, noticing patterns, and revisiting events from other points of view can lead to healing—regardless of whether your work gets published.

On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Melissa Febos. Melissa is the bestselling author of five books, including Girlhood—winner of the National Book Critics Circle Award in Criticism—and a forthcoming memoir, The Dry Season. She teaches us how to create our own narrative in ways that are safe for you and empathetic of others.

If you liked this episode check out: Carvell Wallace on Another Word for Love, How To Start Writing (with Anna Quindlen and John Dickerson), and How To Get Your Book Published

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen.

The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hi everyone, I'm Susie Weiss, and I've noticed there's just simply not enough podcasts in the world. So I'm launching my own. Let's go. Let's go, baby. Second Thought is a weekly show about pop culture. The stuff everyone's been binging, arguing about, obsessing over. Here's the thing about heated rivalry. I mean, even the most devoted swifties, I think we can agree, not our best work. We'll be hosting thoughtful conversations with culture's most important figures. Talk about genius.
0:22.6	Talk about generational talent.
0:23.7	Coming to headphones near you on can agree not our best work. We'll be hosting thoughtful conversations with culture's most important
0:21.1	figures. Talk about genius. Talk about generational talent. Coming to headphones near you on April 17th,
0:25.9	with a first guest you won't want to miss. Available wherever you get your podcasts.
0:30.0	Hey folks, it's Courtney Martin from How To. Before we get into the show, a little invitation for you.
0:36.9	We're planning episodes for the next
0:38.4	few months, and we genuinely want your questions. What do you need advice on? What is the conundrum
0:45.2	that you're facing right now? It can be serious, it can be silly, it can be an amorphous relationship
0:50.9	issue, we love those, or something very practical involving money, your career,
0:56.1	an aspirational hobby. What is keeping you up at night? What is on your bucket list that we
1:02.0	can help you with? We want to know. Please leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 or drop us a quick note at how-to at slate.com. Okay, on to the show.
1:18.2	Welcome to how to. I'm Carvel Wallace. Some of you may know that last year I published a memoir called Another
1:29.0	Word for Love, and it was a pretty scary thing to do. I was afraid that people wouldn't like me.
1:35.7	I was afraid the book would flop. I was afraid that my writing would be too weird and inaccessible.
1:41.5	It was not easy. And I know a lot of you relate. I mean, I'm not the only person
1:47.2	who likes to write memoirs. And not everyone who doesn't want to be a professional author. Some people
1:52.5	need to write memoirs because they want to share their stories with their family members or
1:56.7	their children or grandchildren. Some people write memoirs because they just want to understand what happened to them.
2:03.6	I've taught people like that, and in my experience, writing professionally and writing for personal
2:08.1	reasons, it's pretty much the same.
2:11.0	You come up against the same difficulties, the same fears, the same challenges, and of course,
	...

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