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Famous at Home

How To Talk To Your Kids About Sex with Sam Jolman

Famous at Home

Josh + Christi Straub

Parenting, Relationships, Christianity, Religion & Spirituality, Society & Culture, Kids & Family

4.9653 Ratings

🗓️ 9 July 2025

⏱️ 42 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Sam Jolman says, “Talking to your children about sex should be likened to having 100 one-minute conversations.”
 
As we continue season 5 on relational intelligence, therapist and author Sam Jolman joins us once again, this time to talk about how to help our kids script a narrative of romance.
 
In this episode, Sam shares profound insights on age-specific ways to talk to your kids about their body, why it’s important to follow their questions, and how to cultivate a value-based, not a fear-based conversation. In the end, the goal is to help our kids experience awe, not live in shame.
 
Time Stamps:
0:00 Introduction
2:19 Sam Jolman joins the show!
3:10 Talking to kids ages 0 to 6
6:40 A profound insight on shame and glory
12:09 Talking to kids ages 7 to 12
20:50 Moving from fear-based to values-base conversation with your kids
24:40 Talking to teens
30:10 The difference between arousal and lust 
33:20 Preparing our kids for marriage
40:02 Innocence, not naivety

Show Notes:
Get Sam Jolman’s book The Sex Talk You Never Got.
https://amzn.to/4kflULX
 
If you’re interested in a marriage you love, fill out this form: https://www.famousathome.com/loveyourmarriage
 
Register now for the Tender & Fierce Fall Cohort: https://www.famousathome.com/offers/dDt2Aobj/checkout
 
Download NONAH's brand new single Find My Way Home by clicking here: https://bellpartners.ffm.to/findmywayhome

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Oh, what are those? What's that for? Well, that's what God uses to make babies. It takes an egg from a mom and a sperm, right? And so just, I'm inviting you answer their questions. And you don't have to say everything. You don't have to give an hour long lecture. Yeah, right? You can, but meet their curiosity because if they don't come to you, they're going to go somewhere else.

0:22.5

Yeah.

0:22.9

And curiosity is, again, another natural part of sexuality.

0:29.2

You were made to be curious about your body, sexuality, other people's bodies,

0:34.7

curiosity is not lust.

0:36.8

It is not dangerous.

0:38.9

I won't lose hope in the night when the fire is growing down.

0:47.0

I'll just let go and I'll try help me walk this road and find my way back home.

0:57.0

Welcome back to the famousous at Home podcast.

1:13.3

We are back for part two with my friend Sam Joelman on talking about the topic of sex as we continue season five on relational intelligence and hitting hot topics this summer that really speak to what it means to be

1:28.2

relationally intelligent and how to navigate relationships well. And we talked last

1:33.9

week about sex and marriage. This week we wanted to have him back. He's written a book

1:40.6

called The Sex Talk You Never Got. And especially those of us who are raising

1:45.7

kids, middle schoolers, teenagers, how do we have these conversations with our kids in a way

1:51.2

that we never got, right? And so I would invite you to go back, maybe listen to even some of the

1:56.2

beginning of last week's episode or listen to the entire episode where he lays out this foundation.

2:00.5

But we're going to talk a little bit about that today because I would love Sam for you

2:05.3

to be able to lay that foundation of how we spiritually, scripturally lay a foundation for this

2:11.1

in a way that's pure, the sense of purity to our kids.

2:15.7

And so, Sam, thank you so much for joining us. Welcome back.

2:19.1

Thank you for having me, Joshua. It's great to be here. Absolutely. So, Sam, just real

2:23.0

quickly, for those who might not have listened, they're coming for this topic particularly.

...

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