Hey, this is Leo, for actualized.org.

And in this episode, I'm going to talk about should statements and how they're ruining your life

and how you can stop guilt, shame, bitterness, and blaming. This episode is really a continuation of last week's episode, which was entitled a rant against morality and that episode was pretty foundational so I recommend that if you haven't watched it go watch it first then come back here because what we're going to talk about today is we're going to talk about the practical applications of the sort of philosophical stuff I talked about morality last time.

All right, so we're going to build on that. We're going to show you how to actually now use some of those concepts to eliminate things like guilt or bitterness towards the world or towards other people or blaming of other people for situations and all that kind of stuff.

Right, I'm going to give you one really powerful insight here. It's almost magical this insight. When you fully realize

this insight, it will radically transform the quality of your day-to-day life.

That's the power it can happen. It's very, very simple and it's actually quite

simple to apply as well. But first, a little bit of the explanation. So actually I want to tell

a little story which is my ex-girlfriend. I had a girlfriend a few years back

And we saw each other a lot and the problem though is that it was impossible to maintain a relationship with this woman. And the reason was, and I only figured this out

after maybe a year or two of being with her,

I slowly started to piece together her backstory,

kind of like, what was her her childhood like and you know how

did she grow up and what was her family like and so forth and what I was able to kind of

piece together and I'm I'm kind of speculating but this is kind of the best that I was able to figure out is that her mother

Was extremely moralistic with her and

Filled her mind from the very beginning of her life with all sorts of ideas about what should and shouldn't happen in life.

What's right and what's wrong?

And this is what I call moralism. so she fed her with all these should statements

and she continues to feed her with these should statements for all of her childhood and into her teenage years and even now still as an adult.

And so what happened with my girlfriend is that she had all these very rigid ideas about how life should be what's right what's wrong what she should do what she shouldn't do and it was kind of sad sad to me

because that's not how I was raised. I was raised in a sort of very

...