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Before we start the show, how to is fueled by your questions and conundrums. So if you're wrestling

with how to navigate something in

your life, big or small, serious or funny, we want to hear about it. And for an upcoming episode,

we want to hear about how your life is being affected by revenge. That's right, revenge. You can

share your story about getting even or having petty revenge sicked upon you

by sending us an email at how to at slate.com or leaving us a voicemail at 646-495-4001.

Okay, on with the show. Let's meet this week's listener. I'm Jennifer and I am mom to Maddie,

who is on her way to college in the

fall. Are you excited? I have all the feelings. I am definitely excited because she's a great kid,

but I'm definitely sad because she's a great kid.

Welcome to how to. I'm Carvill Wallace. And let me just say, I know what our listener,

Jennifer, is going through. I have two college age kids, both of whom are out of the house.

And when they left, I experienced this level of anxiety that was terrifying. I mean, you've been your kids' sole source of safety

since the day they were born. I mean, literally in those early years, you could pick them up

and comfort them. And then later, I could come in a car and pick them up. Like, need to come home,

I can come get you. But now, if something happens, they can't just run to me, and I can't just run to them.

They're adults.

...