Hi everyone, it's Rosie. Welcome to Radio Headspace and to Friday. So when I first started

teaching meditation I was certain that everything I was doing was wrong. And one time I was

subbing a class and a student asked if she could stay afterwards to give me some feedback.

And spoiler alert, it was not good. But more on that later.

Suffice to say I had a lot of feelings that could have helped me back at that moment.

But I kept going and over time I was able to see that one round of tough feedback didn't define

me or my abilities. I think we all seek validation. We like to have our feelings affirmed and we like

positive feedback. But when we can self validate, we're not putting as much stock in what others think.

It's more about encouraging and accepting ourselves. So let's talk today about how to self validate

and some ways to find that affirming voice within. Self-veledation means our ability to trust

ourselves and our abilities and to know that everything we need is right here right now.

When we base whether we're good or not good on what others have to say, that can be extremely

insidious for our mental well-being. So for example, if somebody tells you you're really good at

something and you've put so much stock into what this person had to say, the minute that they

don't give you that validation, you're going to think that you no longer have value. So that's where

the issue lies. If you're able to validate yourself, then you don't actually need to have the

feedback from other people. You're not basing your worth or value in what other people have to say.

Case in point, the student that was waiting for me after class to give me her feedback.

When I went outside the class, she started to list how I did everything wrong, how I had

instructed this specific meditation the wrong way and I had left too many pauses in between.

This made her feel really distracted and so she did not have a good meditation experience.

She also added that the teacher I was subbing for was so much better than I was and that I should

...