What's up everybody? Welcome to another episode of AMA where I'm going to be answering your

questions. And by the way, if you want to submit a question, you can do that to AMA at impacttheory.com

and just put AMA questions in the headline. And by the way, we have a 2019 resolution reality checklist.

So make sure that you're sticking to your resolution, seeing it all the way through,

and you're not just copying out as so many people do as January begins to wear on. If you want to

download that bad boy, go to info dot impact theory dot com forward slash resolutions.

Again, that's info dot impact theory dot com forward slash resolutions. All right. First question

is from Merrill Waldo. I have an insatiable emotional hunger yet I have no organized strategy for

getting my needs met by my partner in a healthy way. When I am romantically involved, I oscillate

between an anxious and an avoidant attachment style towards my partner. I get overwhelmed by

my feelings and exhibit emotional storms when my needs aren't met curiously. I have a lot of

fantastic balance relationships with platonic friends and oddly, I do not hold this unattainable

standard for them. I listen to relationship theory all of the time and have been implementing

techniques I've learned there. I've also been in therapy on and off for years and haven't been

able to reframe this major issue just yet. I feel rejected and emotionally vulnerable. I would

love to hear your advice and strategies on how to self-soothe, love myself, and not look to others

for affirmation. Okay. So what I love about questions like this is there is an amazing level of

self-awareness and that level of self-awareness is going to really, really serve you. I think what

you need to do is put into practice some values, beliefs, and rules. Right now, those are going to be

more important to you than habits and routines. So the things that we pursue are the things that we

really value in life. And so if you say my highest value in life is emotional stability, then you're

going to begin to look for ways to really improve upon that. And in those moments where you do it,

...