How To Dismantle Shame

Relationship Advice

Colter Bloxom

Society & Culture, Mental Health, Health & Fitness, Relationships, Sexuality

4.2 • 1.7K Ratings

🗓️ 25 June 2025

⏱️ 52 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Have you ever felt like something about you was just…wrong? In this episode, we dive deep into the roots of shame—where it comes from, why we all experience it, and how it impacts our relationships in sneaky ways like defensiveness, over-explaining, or shutting down. Unpack the experience of shame, tracing it back to early childhood moments when we first began to believe something was wrong with us. They explore the difference between shame and guilt, how shame shows up in relationships through defensiveness or withdrawal, and why healing it requires identifying core shame messages and grief over unmet needs. In this episode, we talk about: - Shame is the fear of disconnection - Shame shows up in relationships - Grieving unmet needs - Replacing shame with truth - and more! Give Me Discounts! Skylight - Visit skylightcal.com/IDO for $30 off your 15 inch calendar. Prolon - Visit ProlonLife.com/IDO to claim your 15% discount and your bonus gift. PXG - Visit PXGApparel.com/IDO or use promo code: PODAPP-IDO to save 10% off your Spring/Summer 2025 Collection order. Amazfit - Visit www.amazfit.com/IDO to get 10% off Spark My Relationship Course: Get $100 off our online course. Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Sitting quietly once you've made the house all shiny.
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1:16.0	Hello, and welcome to relationship advice.
1:23.8	My name is Coulter Bloxum, and I am here with my friends and my co-hosts, Horn Malkyrie, and Kayla Bozovich.
1:29.8	We are three licensed professional counselors, and we run a therapy community together in Phoenix, Arizona.
1:34.1	And this podcast is all about helping you get unstuck in your relationships.
1:42.3	And one of the biggest things we want you to know is that the first step towards connecting with others is actually in connecting with yourself.
1:46.4	And so we dive into topics all around how we can do that relating to our emotions, using tools that we can use in our relationships. And today's
1:52.5	episode is going to be about shame. And in order to dive us in, I want to tell you a little
	...

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