How to build your kid's confidence — by leaving them alone (w/ Lenore Skenazy)

How to Be a Better Human

TED

Self-improvement, Personal Growth, Better Human, Chris Duffy, Interviews, Emotional Awareness, Self-help, Education

4.2 • 1.3K Ratings

🗓️ 29 September 2025

⏱️ 48 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

How do you raise confident and capable children in a seemingly scary and unsafe world? According to Lenore Skenazy, the solution is simple yet controversial — you leave the kids alone. Lenore is the president of Let Grow and the founder of the Free Range Kids Movement where she argues that parents don’t need to hover over their kids as much because they’ll be more than okay — they’ll thrive. Chris and Lenore discuss why overprotecting kids can backfire, how parents might be unintentionally stifling children’s innate curiosity, and why one of the best tools to teach kids is to step away and let them learn and problem-solve themselves.

Follow

Host: Chris Duffy (Instagram: @chrisiduffy | chrisduffycomedy.com)

Guest: Lenore Skenazy (Instagram: @lenoreskenazy_freerange | LinkedIn: @lenoreskenazy | Website: https://www.freerangekids.com/)

Links

Instagram: @letgroworg

https://letgrow.org/

Free Range Kids: How Parents and Teachers Can Let Go and Let Grow

Subscribe to TED

Instagram: @ted

YouTube: @TED

TikTok: @tedtoks

LinkedIn: @ted-conferences

Website: ted.com

Podcasts: ted.com/podcasts

For the full text transcript, visit go.ted.com/BHTranscripts

Interested in learning more about upcoming TED events? Follow these links:

TEDNext: ted.com/futureyou

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	You're listening to How to Be a Better Human.
0:04.0	I'm your host, Chris Duffy.
0:06.0	Let me tell you a quick story about cars.
0:08.0	Growing up, my family did not own a car.
0:11.0	We took public transportation.
0:12.0	So cars always felt foreign and strange and a little bit dangerous to me.
0:16.0	In my life now, I do have a car, but I know almost nothing about maintenance.
0:24.8	And so when I took my car into Raz, my mechanic, who has also now become my friend,
0:27.9	I asked him to help me change the car air filter.
0:32.4	And rather than just charge me for the job, Raz had me sit down and watch him do it. And I saw how extremely simple this is.
0:35.3	You literally just open one compartment, slide the old filter out,
0:38.7	and slide the new filter in. It couldn't be simpler. So then the next time I needed to change the
0:43.3	air filter, I did it myself. And I felt so proud. genuinely, it made my day that I could now
0:50.8	change a car air filter all on my own. And that experience is what today's guest, Lenore Skenezi, wants all kids to have.
0:58.9	Not literally changing the air filter on my old Toyota Camry,
1:02.9	but the experience of being given independence and allowed to do things that maybe seem a little bit
1:08.1	dangerous or outside of their comfort zone.
1:10.8	Lenore argues that modern parenting has become so focused on safety that that maybe seem a little bit dangerous or outside of their comfort zone.
1:14.5	Lenore argues that modern parenting has become so focused on safety that we are depriving kids of the chance to learn themselves
1:17.5	and causing a whole host of other issues.
1:20.2	Here's a clip from Lenore's TED Talk.
1:22.3	We have to realize that we've been sort of brainwashed into believing
	...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from TED, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of TED and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.