Hi, my name is Lewis Howes and welcome to the Daily Motivation Show.

How do we build that confidence in ourselves when all we hear is a negative feedback, though?

It's going to happen. We can distance ourselves, but we keep hearing it. How do we then say,

okay, I'm not going to listen to this, but it really affects me and it hurts me?

Yes.

How do you then say, all right, I'm going to hear it every day or every week. It's going to come my way no matter what I do. But psychologically, internally, what are the tools or the skills we can acquire to develop that belief? First thing I always say is you've got to take yourself back to any time in

your past career or even current career and remind yourself of all the things that you've good at,

all the accomplishments. Celebrate your wins. Amen. Man, I'm a tall, handsome brown man. You know,

I'm really good in math. I look good in white dress shirts. Whatever those things are. Remember, Ivan, you were the first person to get your PhDs before the age of 30s. Whatever those things are. And it's not enough just to tell yourself, you got to write it down. When I took that job as an AD, even when his job as a vice president, self-doubt comes in. There's enough people tell. I've never done this before. Why should I be in this position? You only got the job because he's black. You only got the job because you're a woman. Whatever it is, there's all people that are going to be coming at you. And if you're not careful, you'll start to take on those thoughts. And then those thoughts will influence your belief system. And that belief system will then influence your actions and you'll start messing up

and it's this self-fulfilling prophecy. So stop that thought, put something down on paper. You'll hear

me speak about a self-confidence letter, a letter you write to yourself. Der Luys congratulations

on building your business. You set a goal and you accomplished it. And it's your personal brag sheet to yourself. When I became an AD, I had to read that probably, I kid you not, two weeks straight. And this isn't about ego. This isn't about, oh, you're telling everybody how good you are. No, this is your personal brag sheet. Yeah, self-confidence letter or a letter to yourself.

We call this rainy date notes from an exercise that I've been through where it's like, write yourself a letter that when you're going through something challenging, you open it up. I love that. You remind yourself of your gift, how much you matter, you know, the contribution you've made in your life, your family, your friends, things like that. or you could get a group of friends to write letters to you that you seal and you open up when you need some inspiration

or motivation. I love it. And not only just from feeling good and happiness, but the science also then

links that to performance. And don't quote me on the numbers, but I think you're 19% more productive.

Analytic problem solving. You're 29% quicker to solve complex problems.

You increase your revenue by 36% if you use three statements of happiness, personal affirmations.

No way.

Sonny Lubramowski, 2006, Harvard study.

Three affirmations, three positive statements of gratitude, three expressions

of hope, warmth, joy, that is what showed.

Wow.

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