How To Be Confident If I’m Not Tall Enough?

Shrink For The Shy Guy

Dr. Aziz: Social Anxiety And Confidence Expert, Author and Coach

Health & Fitness, Mental Health, Careers, Business, Self-improvement, Education

4.8 • 649 Ratings

🗓️ 5 September 2016

⏱️ 7 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

How can I have self love and self confidence with something I have no control over?

Our listener today describes how he is insecure about his height at 5'4" and lately it's been difficult to deal with knowing how society deals with superficial things like height.

Women especially think that height is a deal breaker, how can he have confidence in himself when it's something he can't change?

Transcript

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0:00.0	And now it's time to Ask the Shrink.
0:09.2	Hey, welcome to another bonus episode of Ask the Shrink.
0:13.2	Today's question is from a listener named Matt.
0:16.0	Matt's question is,
0:18.2	I've been feeling kind of insecure about my height lately. I'm 5'4, 5-5 with the
0:25.6	lifts I wear. I get it. Have confidence in yourself. Don't worry what other people think.
0:31.0	If you have a problem, they're probably, if they have a problem with it, they're probably not
0:34.7	worth your time. Yeah, I've heard it all, and I definitely
0:38.5	agree with it. But it's rather difficult to deal with all of this knowing how society treats
0:45.7	superficial things like height. Maybe I've been spending too much time around negative social
0:50.8	media, but it seems that height is a huge deal breaker for women, especially.
0:56.2	I guess what I'm asking is how can I practice self-love and self-confidence when I'm stuck
1:01.3	with something that I can't change without the help of an expensive, risky height operation?
1:07.9	I can feel confident and love myself. I know I can, but it's hard sometimes knowing that I'm going to get the short end of the stick, pun intended. Awesome. Thanks, Matt. This is a great question. I know, I mean, we all have our thing. For you, it's your height, but other people listening, it might be their height, and it might be something else about your appearance, where it's like no, you know, I mean, we all have our thing. For you, it's your height, but other people listening,
1:28.0	it might be their height, and it might be something else about your appearance, where it's like,
1:31.2	no, you know, sure, I can love myself, but objectively this is looked down upon. Objectively,
1:35.9	this is not attractive or desirable. It's going to make me less of a contender in dating,
1:40.9	maybe even in business. And here's the thing. You live in your own reality.
1:50.6	And what happens in your life is a reflection of that reality, what you believe to be true.
1:57.2	So if you believe the guy is 5'4, that means women don't like him. Guess what you're
2:03.2	going to find? Women not liking you. Women rejecting you. Women being like, oh yeah, he's nice,
2:09.2	but he's a little too short. I don't know. That is what you will find. That's what you're going to
	...

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