How do you make friends as an adult? A complete guide with Hope Kelaher

Mental Makeover

Lauren Curtis

Mental Health, Health & Fitness

4.8 • 601 Ratings

🗓️ 26 March 2020

⏱️ 42 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

We seem to make friends so easily as children, but as we grow up and leave school, things start to get a little more complicated. One friend moves overseas, one friend gets super busy with their career, one friend starts a family and one friend slowly drifts away for whatever reason. Or, perhaps you just never had a lot of friends to begin with. It seems to get harder to establish friendships the older we get, because many lifelong friendship circles have already formed, so you either have to try and penetrate an existing circle or find people that are in the same position as you. It can be pretty intimidating (especially for introverts); so I wanted to speak to an expert about how to go about finding and forming new friendships as adults. Hope Kelaher is a therapist from NYC and the author of 'Here To Make Friends: How to Make Friends as an Adult', and she answers all of your burning questions! We talk about everything to do with finding new friends, introverts vs. extroverts, self-worth, vulnerability, maintaining friendships and even moving past small talk. Hope's book is available from Amazon (.com and .com.au), and Barnes and Noble if you're in the US :) I hope you enjoy!

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hey guys, welcome to the Mental Makeover podcast. I'm Lauren Curtis. You've probably heard the phrase,
0:06.4	the grass is always greener on the other side, but I believe it's greener where you water it.
0:12.2	This podcast is here to provide you with meaningful advice from myself and others in order to give
0:18.2	your little patch of grass the best chance to grow and flourish.
0:22.7	Hey guys, welcome back. I wanted to create this episode for those of you who are struggling to
0:29.7	make friends or find friends or maintain friends or feel like you're worthy enough for friends.
0:36.8	Like does everything to do with friendship,
0:39.2	adult friendship. It's something that I asked a lot about. And I have done a few episodes on this
0:45.8	in the past, but I wanted to speak to someone who specialises in this. And I'm speaking to
0:51.8	Hope Keller. She is a therapist based out of New York City,
0:55.8	and she is the author of the book, Here to Make Friends, How to Make Friends as an Adult.
1:01.3	So, yeah, we're basically just touching on some of the points she raises in her book.
1:06.0	Of course, if you are interested in going into further depth in this topic, then you can
1:09.8	purchase her book and the info about that is at the very end of the episode but for now I just wanted to
1:16.8	yeah share with you guys the most commonly asked questions and her answers to those
1:23.2	questions went on to Instagram and asked my followers if they had any questions around friendship,
1:31.3	whether it be making new friends, where to find new friends, dealing with old friendships or
1:36.8	new friendships or how to work through, you know, arguments and just all different types
1:41.7	of questions.
1:42.8	And we've got so many responses. So I've
1:44.9	tried to list them all down and we'll cover them as we go. But I guess the most commonly
1:50.3	asked question that came through was where can you find potential new friends? Sure. That is a pretty
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