How can I be present when grief is always reminding me of what could have been?

Ask Dr. Julie Hanks

Dr. Julie Hanks

Self-improvement, Society & Culture, Education, Relationships, Health & Fitness, Mental Health

4.6 • 734 Ratings

🗓️ 30 January 2024

⏱️ 43 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Listen as I talk with Jennifer and answer the question “How can I be present when grief is always reminding me of what could have been?“ Jennifer shares the story of her relationship, her husband’s cancer diagnosis, and her experience of being a new mom of twins while navigating the grief of losing her husband. Now, five years later, she feels split between being present in her daily life and grieving the life she didn’t get to live with her late husband.Jennifer and I talk more about what it...

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hi, friends. Welcome to Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. I'm so glad you're here.
0:13.2	In each episode, I coach a listener through a tough question about mental health, personal
0:18.3	growth, family relationships, or faith journeys. My goal is to help
0:22.9	you think, feel, or do something differently to improve your life because you listen to this podcast.
0:29.5	I want you to step into your power and create a life you love. Let's get started.
0:36.1	I am so excited today to welcome Jennifer Hanks.
0:40.9	No relation.
0:43.1	And she's at Coco's Caravan on Instagram.
0:46.9	And she's amazing.
0:47.9	We got to know each other at a retreat last month.
0:51.3	So welcome to the podcast, Jennifer.
0:54.0	Thank you so much for having me. And it was so fun getting to know you at the retreat. month. So welcome to the podcast, Jennifer. Thank you so much for having me. And it was so fun
0:56.9	getting to know you at the retreat. It was just like, it was so fun to get to know you. I love that.
1:02.9	So do you have a question for me today? Yeah, I do. So I'm like, should I first share my backstory or start with some.
1:12.4	Yeah. Well, let me ask the question. Why don't you ask the question? And then like you can tell the
1:17.8	backstory that after that. Okay. I feel like the thing that I struggle with the most post grief
1:27.0	and losing my husband. I have a hard time with acceptance.
1:34.3	Okay. And living in the now. I feel like I'm always split in between grieving the past
1:41.5	and like what we had and grieving the future and what we could have had.
1:48.3	So like a lot of the times I'm like, if he was here, he would be doing this with me.
1:52.7	We could be doing this.
1:54.1	Yeah.
	...

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