New episode of Klein Alley's show is about to begin, but before that can happen, Allie, let's tell the people what they need to know. You mean about San Bernardino International Airport? Of course, I'm talking about the San Bernardino International Airport. Easy, close, and not LAX. And parking is always just five bucks a day, which means it is El Cheapo approved. Fly nonstop to Provo, Utah, for all the ski and snowboarding or wives you can handle.

And of course, you can fly into my hometown of San Francisco.

San Bernardino International Airport.

When airports smell great.

This is the world famous K.R.

Good morning, welcome here Tuesday.

It's not officially summer yet, but it sure feels like it.

Funner Summer is officially underway.

Oh, my wife and kid are so sunburned.

Already?

Oh, yeah, all day in the pool over the weekend, all day, all night.

Oh, because they finally crack.

That's the big thing about Memorial Day.

You can start wearing those white pants, and they crack those pools open, those public pools finally opened up again.

Yeah, finally being heated, yes. So there was a one-time application of sunscreen at the beginning of the day, and not another reapply. Everyone is like a lobster. Well, since that kid of yours has your DNA, as you know, Allie does not tan. She just gets... I go sunburn, and then I go back to white. Yeah, it's just either past it's either pasty white or red and peeling. There is no developing of a base town whatsoever. If I just came back from Hawaii, you would never know. We got a lot to get to this hour, including a chance for you to try to bring some pride to lesbians everywhere. I also feel like as a straight man, I know a thing or two about lesbians. So the Les Off returns with

celebrity guest host Ellen DeGeneres. You don't know much about lesbian culture other than what I've

told you. You just watch a lot of lesbian porn. That's right. But so much that I feel like it makes

me an expert and probably know more than you. Well, watching that kind of porn is not realistic. That's stuff that is made for men by men. If that's not real, I don't want to know what real is. It sounds like this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, you more. Hey, my, my, roo, woo, woo, woo, woo. Don't ruin it for me. It's not real. That's not how we have sex.

Keep going, please.

We have sex like this. Yum, yum, yum, yum. Oh, God. That is disgusting. We get to the Les off a little bit later this morning, and if that didn't ruin your breakfast, I don't know what will. And then, of course, we will help you live forever with this woman. Sugar over strong bodies. anything. As I said. That's right. I think that was lesbian porn right there. I don't know what that was. So anyway, lots to get to this woman. Sugar over strawberry. As I said.

That's right.

I think that was lesbian porn right

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