Sometimes you have no clue how to respond to people when they say or do something awful.

I address that and so much more on my other podcast, Love and Abuse, over at love and abuse.

Come.

Welcome to the overwhelmed brain

where you'll learn to make decisions that are right for you

so that you can create the life you want now.

Hey, this is Paul Kolyani and I'm here

to help you learn to deal with difficult people and tackle life's challenges without compromising who you are.

This show consists of my personal opinions and is meant for informational purposes only.

Always seek a professional for your mental health and well-being.

I'm just going to jump right into a curveball for me.

I'm going to read an email that I haven't pre-read, I haven't looked at, and let's see where we go with

it because I actually did read the first sentence and I said, oh, I got to read this on the air because I want to address this this person wrote hey I'm writing to ask you a question for more clarity and validation I was bullied growing up between 12 and 18. My bullies were people that considered me friends and so

far that's all I know. So I'm going to kind of go through this with you and I'll tell you my thinking

on it. They consider me friends, some of them my best friends. It made everyone comfortable bullying me without realizing they were in fact bullying me.

I specified this because if I were to say I was bullied, every one of them would deny it and say that they were just playing.

I had a close friend who I'd mention it to for over a decade just for her to validate me, but she would always say that they didn't know they were hurting me instead of simply validating me.

The past two years have been eventful for me.

I have grown so much to the point.

I cut out anything that hinders my growth and keeps me in the past,

including old classmates that I kept in touch with. I let it slide because they didn't

know they were hurting me, and so I think that's when this person decided, you know what, I'm not letting it slide anymore.

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