Here’s How You TRULY Connect! (aka The Consequences of Crummy Communication)

The Virtual Couch

Tony Overbay LMFT

Education, Mental Health, Health & Fitness, Self-improvement

5 • 643 Ratings

🗓️ 8 December 2020

⏱️ 34 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Tony talks about how to get to the deeper parts of a conversation with your spouse using his 4 Pillars of a Connected Conversation. Without the right communication skills, and techniques, you’re not simply having an unproductive conversation, you’re missing out on an opportunity to truly connect, and grow closer to your spouse. And these techniques are not as difficult to put into practice, they just don’t come naturally. - Sign up at http://tonyoverbay.com (http://tonyoverbay.com) to learn more about Tony’s upcoming “Magnetic Marriage” program! - This episode of The Virtual Couch is sponsored by http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch (http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch) With the continuing “sheltering” rules that are spreading across the country PLEASE do not think that you can’t continue or begin therapy now. http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch (http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch) can put you quickly in touch with licensed mental health professionals who can meet through text, email, or videoconference often as soon as 24-48 hours. And if you use the link http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch (http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch) you will receive 10% off your first month of services. Please make your own mental health a priority, http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch (http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch)offers affordable counseling, and they even have sliding scale options if your budget is tight.-Tony mentioned a product that he used to take out all of the "uh's" and "um's" that, in his words, "must be created by wizards and magic!" because it's that good! To learn more about Descript click here https://descript.com?lmref=v95myQ-Please subscribe to The Virtual Couch YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/c/TheVirtualCouchPodcast/ (https://www.youtube.com/c/TheVirtualCouchPodcast/) and sign up at http://tonyoverbay.com (http://tonyoverbay.com) to learn more about Tony’s upcoming “Magnetic Marriage” program!-Tony's FREE parenting course, “Tips For Parenting Positively Even In the Not So Positive Times” is available NOW. Just go to https://www.tonyoverbay.com/courses-2/ (https://www.tonyoverbay.com/courses-2/)and sign up today. This course will help you understand why it can be so difficult to communicate with and understand your children. You’ll learn how to keep your buttons hidden, how to genuinely give praise that will truly build inner wealth in your child, teen, or even in your adult children, and you’ll learn how to move from being “the punisher” to being someone your children will want to go to when they need help.-Tony's new best-selling book "He's a Porn Addict...Now What? An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions" is now available on Kindle. https://amzn.to/38mauBo-Tony Overbay, is the co-author of "He's a Porn Addict...Now What? An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions" now available on Amazon https://amzn.to/33fk0U4 (https://amzn.to/33fk0U4). The book debuted in the number 1 spot in the Sexual Health Recovery category and remains there as the time of this record. The book has received numerous positive reviews from professionals in the mental health and recovery fields.-You can learn more about Tony's pornography recovery program The Path Back by visiting http://pathbackrecovery.com And visit http://tonyoverbay.com (http://tonyoverbay.com) and sign up to receive updates on upcoming programs, and podcasts.

Transcript

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0:00.0	On today's episode of the virtual couch, we're talking about communication, specifically
0:05.2	what happens when couples or when people in general don't know how to communicate effectively.
0:10.0	Because without the tools to communicate effectively, you are not only having a bad
0:14.5	experience in that very moment that you're trying to communicate, but you're missing out on
0:19.0	so much more, primarily the opportunity to
0:22.1	truly connect with somebody that you care about, that that and so much more. Coming up on
0:26.5	this episode of the virtual couch.
0:44.9	Hey, everybody. Welcome to episode 237 of the virtual couch. I am your host, Tony Overbay,
0:49.1	and I'm a licensed marriage and family therapist, and I'm grateful that you're here. I am going to try to get to the topic a little quicker today. I'm going to try things a bit different.
0:55.3	I want to talk about communication. So just a heads up, I'll probably slip in an ad or two at some point, honestly,
1:00.5	but if you just want to stop by tonyoverbay.com and sign up there to find out more about some
1:05.1	upcoming projects I'm working on, or better yet, go follow me on Instagram at Virtual Couch. That would
1:10.2	be fantastic, wonderful.
1:12.2	And honestly, if I really get on a roll, I may in fact forget the ads.
1:16.6	Thank you, ADHD.
1:18.1	But let me start with a story.
1:19.8	And then I'm going to dig more into today's topic of communication.
1:23.7	So in the intro that I've used over the last, I don't know what, 236 episodes, I like to call out the fact that I am an ultramarathon runner.
1:32.0	And probably a year and a half, maybe actually pushing two years ago, I sustained a bit of an injury playing basketball with my son of all things.
1:40.5	And it wasn't the 25 years of ultra running that kind of did me in.
1:46.2	It was a quick pivot in a basketball game. So, you know, I actually first took a hit trying to defend somebody and I separated
1:51.7	a rib from some cartilage and that put me out for a little while. And then I come back and I plant
	...

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