If your partner refuses to give you the passcode to their phone, is that a huge red flag?

So this emails a little bit confusing because they don't want us to be biased as to which

person in the relationship is withholding the passcode.

So they want to keep the men fair, they want to keep the women fair.

So we're taking all of that out of the equation.

Abby's got the email.

My boyfriend and I are in a huge fight about something we disagree on and it's really

blown up.

I told him I was going to ask you what you all think and help us figure it out because

both of us are convinced that the other one is wrong.

He told me not to tell you which one of us thinks a certain way, so as not to create

any bias.

I'm not mad at you.

All right.

So one of us, partner A, needed to borrow partner B's phone for a second.

The screen was locked.

So partner A asked for the passcode to unlock partner B's phone.

Partner B took the phone back to enter the passcode themselves and handed it back to partner

A.

That caused a debate as to why partner A couldn't know the passcode to partner B's phone.

Partner B says there's no reason for partner A to have access to the phone.

However, partner B knows the passcode to partner A's phone.

...