Help! My Spouse Is So Critical | Ep. 399

Awesome Marriage Podcast

Dr. Kim Kimberling

Christianity, Relationships, Society & Culture, Religion & Spirituality

4.9 • 813 Ratings

🗓️ 25 February 2020

⏱️ 27 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Do you feel beaten down by your spouse? Does it feel like nothing you do is ever right or good enough for your spouse? Well you certainly aren't alone. It can really wear on a marriage when one spouse is overly critical. In this episode Dr. Kim & Christina share about what to do when your spouse is critical.

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.

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*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!

NOTEWORTHY QUOTES

"If it's not normal for your spouse to be very critical of you, ask yourself what might be going on to make them act that way. " - Christina Dodson
"Use Stop, Look, Listen when communicating with your critical spouse." - Dr. Kim Kimberling
"If you're delivering criticism to your spouse, make sure you do it in a loving, grace-filled way that they will hear the heart behind what you're saying." - Dr. Kim Kimberling
"Give your spouse time to process any criticism that you've given them." - Christina Dodson
"If my spouse has something critical that's of value to say to me, I want her to be able to say it." - Dr. Kim Kimberling
"Before giving your spouse criticism, ask yourself three questions: 'Should it be said? Should it be said by me? Should it be said now?" - Dr. Kim Kimberling
"When giving your spouse feedback, don't speak negatively. Speak to the potential that you see in them." - Christina Dodson

Transcript

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0:00.0	Do you feel beaten down by your spouse? Does it feel like nothing you do is ever right or good enough for your spouse?
0:13.5	Well, you certainly are not alone. It can be really wearing on a marriage when one spouse is
0:18.1	overly critical. In this episode, we're going to share what to do
0:21.3	when your spouse is critical. We pray you find this episode helpful to you and your marriage.
0:27.7	Welcome to the awesome marriage podcast, a place for honest conversations about marriage and
0:32.1	practical advice on how to have a God-honoring awesome marriage. I am your co-host, Christina Dodson.
0:38.5	On the show, we'll be your host, Dr. Kim Kimmerling. Dr. Kim is a marriage counselor and has been married for over 50 years.
0:44.3	His passion is to help you strengthen your most intimate relationship.
1:01.9	Dr. Kim, is it common in a marriage to have one spouse that is overly critical?
1:04.8	I think it happens a lot just because how I see it in counseling.
1:07.0	And maybe it's because they've gotten to that point in the marriage.
1:11.3	And by that point, one's critical over what's happening or not happening all that kind of stuff i i think most couples one probably is a little more critical than the other i think
1:16.8	that just kind of sometimes either family of origin or nature or something like that and so and the
1:21.6	extent of the criticalness may vary you know how how big a deal is this you know and is it something
1:26.9	the other person just says i'm not fighting that battle? You know, and is it something the other person just says,
1:28.0	I'm not fighting that battle and lets it go, or is it something that I am so tired of this. It is just
1:33.1	killing me, it's killing our marriage, all that kind of stuff. But I do think there's probably,
1:37.2	there's a lot of couples where one, and it's, to me, it's not, I think sometimes we always think it's the female, maybe that. I've seen a lot of
1:44.3	guys that fall in that category. To me, it's more of a 50-50 thing. Yeah, I'd agree with that.
1:49.9	I think in the couples that I see in my sphere, it's definitely 50-50, female versus male.
1:55.0	Let's play a fun game, Dr. Kim. I didn't prep you for this, But I'll guess who's the more critical one in your marriage and you guess who's the more
2:01.4	critical one in our marriage?
	...

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