Can you get away with mouthing off to a cop?

All right, can you say your alphabet to J for me?

Oh, sure. Which one of you guys is J?

I just picked up my paycheck back in high school and must have been 16 or 17 and a fairly new driver.

An officer pulled me over for not pulling completely into the road going from driveway to driveway,

like I drove 10 feet on the wrong side, but there

was no traffic. The officer said, can you even afford a ticket as a new driver? And my dumb butt

said, I did just pick up my paycheck. It wasn't until afterwards that I thought more along the

lines of having demerit points on my license is more than likely what he meant. He let me go with a

warning.

Driving through Kansas City and I got pulled over, I was wearing a twins' cap. The cop said something about being ready to give me a warning, but then he saw my camp, and I said,

Hey, it's not like the royals and twins have been good at the same time. He said he's actually

a Cubs fan, and I couldn't stop myself from saying,

Oh, I'm sorry. He laughed and gave me a warning.

We were in a car park just off the motorway in a Toyota MR2. The police pulled in and

got out of their car. One of the officers put his hand on the bonnet, the hood, of the MR2

and said, bonnet's a bit hot, been ragging it, have we?

And I replied, funny that, mate, it's rear engine.

The second officer found it hilarious, and the first looked incredibly embarrassed.

I was waiting to buy something at a store, but there was no one behind the cash register.

There was already a lady in front of me who seemed to have been waiting for a while.

We rang the little bell a couple of times, but no one appeared. After waiting some time, I joked,

...