Hard Factor 3/3: Super Tuesday Rundown, Horny Old Chris Matthews Resigns, Woman Infected with Coronavirus Visits Texas Mall

Hard Factor

Comedy

4.8 • 4.4K Ratings

🗓️ 3 March 2020

⏱️ 28 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

On today’s episode of Hard Factor... SUPER TUESDAY - It’s SUPER TUESDAY! Wes takes us through a state by state breakdown of what to expect. The major news is Mayor Pete and Amy Klobuchar dropped out and both endorsed Uncle Joe Biden. Democratic primary polls will be open in the following states: Vermont, Virginia, North Carolina, Arkansas, Alabama, Maine, Massachusetts, Oklahoma, Tennessee, Texas, Colorado, Minnesota, Utah, California, and American Samoa (UNITS). Find your local polling place and vote. WOMAN INFECTED WITH CORONAVIRUS COUGHS ON EVERYTHING IN SAN ANTONIO - Mark gives us a Coronavirus update including a tale about a Texas woman that was let out of quarantine in San Antonio after testing positive for the virus. The walking angel of death really made the rounds, staying at the Holiday Inn Express, (smart) near San Antonio International Airport after visiting the North Star Mall, a giant indoor mall 2 miles from San Antonio airport. Great work all around on that one. HARDBALL HOST CHRIS MATTHEWS FINALLY DEFEATED BY HIS OWN HORNINESS - Chris Matthews is out as host of Hard Ball on MSNBC after 20 years of yelling at and eye-banging guests. Matthews at first said he was leaving because it was time for younger people to cover politics but what he really meant is a younger host might be less inclined to make sexual advances on guests. Also being that Matthews is 74, I’m assuming that wanted or not sexual advances from pretty much anyone other than Matthews are going to be met with a significantly higher success rate. Matthew said on his last broadcast, “Compliments on a woman's appearance that some men, including me, might have once incorrectly thought were okay were not okay, not then and certainly not today. And for making such comments in the past, I'm sorry," GENIUS WOMAN INVENTS MOTION ACTIVATED PRESSURE WASHER BURGLAR ALARM - A homeowner in Porterville, California has rigged up a motion activated high pressure sprinkler system to thwart would be thieves from robbing her. Not only did she ingeniously engineer an effective burglar deterrent but she created a fun new hobby in the process. Brought to you by PredictIt Get a free $20 with your first $20 deposit at http://predictit.org/promo/HardFactor20 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:55.6	What it is this is my joeman Randy Savage and this is our factor and there is no one that does it better right now
1:04.9	Yeah, nobody does it better. I repeat myself go ahead tell me something right now
1:25.6	Morning you're welcome to another episode of March back to present it by the barstool news network it is Tuesday March 3rd 2020 that is super Tuesday
1:37.4	Whoo, we got the full crew here. How you boys feeling today? Tomahawk Tuesday. I'm feeling like I got my fucking vote on because I'm a voter and if you're
1:47.1	If you believe in America, you should fucking vote today
1:50.6	Yeah, ready for some stakes here. Yeah, yeah
1:53.9	If you're eligible to vote in your state's primary get on out there and do it
1:57.9	Like we said it's super Tuesday
1:59.3	So was is gonna give us a super Tuesday preview as the main story and then the rest of us got a lightning round of other headlines was take it away
2:06.8	Yeah, as we'll said big day for us here at Hardfactor and a big day for the nation
2:12.1	It is officially super Tuesday. I generally refer to Tuesdays is just just Tuesday or Taco Tuesday or just another shitty Tuesday
2:20.0	But today it is super Tuesday and that's because well, it's fucking super important as the Democrats inch closer to nominating who will lose to I mean
2:28.0	I take on President Trump in the 2020
	...

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