This is looking kind of like this is a show, almost.

This is kind of like looking like it's a show.

This is starting to look like this is like a show or something.

I don't even know what we're going to do.

This is starting to look like some kind of entertainment.

And as such, there probably is something like that we have to do like,

hello and welcome to the tip show Spuptacular. We're almost back. I've got my slaves just working in the word mines daily now. They're little Morlocks. They never see the fucking surface of the earth anymore. I've got them working harder than employees did on Red Dead Redemption 2.

That's a joke for nobody here, but it's very funny because the boss talked about how cool it was that everybody worked 100 hours a week on it.

And all I can think of is that's like Gilded Age slavery, dude.

I don't fucking, what?

Oh, hello! Hello! How's everybody doing?

I have an official show beginning today, before we begin, like it's an actual show.

I actually, like, sat down and wrote something, and I'm going to, you know, do it now.

I'm going to free will it just a little bit.

But of all the stories that I went traveling,

and all the weird people and all the strange things that happened to me,

this is the funnest story.

I thought about, like, maybe telling them all.

There was about a half dozen.

But then I realized, this story's kind of long, and this story is for sure the most fun.

So here, for the very first time, a brand new segment, get used to it, there's going to be a lot of brand new segments that I never do again.

A brand new segment for the first time, Travel Tales, and it's even got its own theme song.

...