Um, how are you?

Most people answer that question with fine or good.

But obviously it's not always fine and it's usually not even that good.

This is a podcast that asks people to be honest about their pain,

to just be honest about how they really feel, about the hard parts of life.

And guess what? It's complicated.

I'm Nora McNerney.

And this is terrible.

Thanks for asking.

I am, and I don't love this about myself, but I am capable of very deep pettiness

if there is a wrongdoing. of very deep pettiness.

If there is a wrongdoing against me,

but more likely a loved one or even a complete stranger,

I am unlikely to forget it. I'm unlikely to forgive it. I will hold on to it forever. If I see a cross to bear, I will bear it.

Many of you will recall the first time I told you about

my grudge book back in I don't know, 2015, 16, I had a therapist recommend that I write down all of the grudges that I was holding, big, small, that I get them out, that I put

them somewhere besides my, and my heart.

I did that.

I wrote down in great detail the who, what, when, where, and why.

The exercise was meant to, I believe, help me get some objectivity to these very, very subjective experiences.

And in the process of writing them out, I discovered that sometimes the problem was me,

hi hello, and sometimes you know I really had been through an experience that was not my fault. I was able to see the

...