God, Jesus, And Santa Discuss Erection Fraud

The God Pod

God

Humor, Comedy, News Commentary, Satire, Satan, God, News, Montypython

4.7 • 1.2K Ratings

🗓️ 1 December 2022

⏱️ 59 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

It’s a God Pod pre-Christmas Special!: God’s angry doppelgänger Santa slides down Heaven’s chimney (if you know what I mean) and joins Jesus (who is the reason for the season) and God on the 🎵most stressful time of the yeeeeeear!🎵 to sing public domain Christmas songs, talk about the toxic working conditions at the North Pole, cringe at Santa kissing daddy under the cameltoe, behold God’s Mastodon butt cheek tattoo, avoid elf butts and kidney stones, and laugh about the ongoing Elon Musk Twitter fire and Herschel Walker’s erection fraud. Weenie Boy Mcgoo returns, George Takei pops in to say hi, Jesus rates The Guardians Of The Galaxy Holiday Special, the Santa Claus TV series (starring Tim Allen on Disney+), and Santa rates Mormon porn. And they somehow find time to discuss the FIFA Qatar World Cup mess. So throw your CVS receipts on the fire and cozy up with your favorite podcast app because you’re about to get possessed by the Christmas spirit. Ew. The God Pod: Have It Yahweh! After 6000 years of running the universe, God realized that Satan is kicking his butt, like, really bad. Over the centuries and despite lots of trying, God has not been able to smite the forces of evil. So, he started a podcast to do just that. Full of fun and heart, the God Pod is a twice-weekly opportunity for God to hang out with his fellow deities and maybe even meet some interesting humans. NEW EPISODES MONDAYS AND THURSDAYS The God Pod is everywhere! Signup for the God Pod Newsletter: https://god.dailydot.com/newsletter/ YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/TheGodPod TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thegodpodcast Mastodon: https://universeodon.com/@godpod Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/goodgodabove/ Join our Discord server for FREE and hang out with fellow fans of the God Pod:: https://discord.gg/7v3Cc4pjMC Get the God Pod ad-free on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/godpod Find the God pod wherever you get podcasts. thegodpodcast.com THANKS TO OUR SPONSOR: Give Crescent Canna THC gummies a try or enjoy any of their potent, effective, and legal cannabis products at crescentcanna.com and get 30% OFF with my special discount code: GODPOD. You must be 21 or older to purchase or consume THC products. Age verification at checkout. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Today on the god pod I'm Santa Lizzo. You love Lizzo, right Santa? Oh, she's on the good list
0:06.6	That's for sure. I'm gonna bring her some new flutes this year
0:10.3	Maybe maybe one that belonged to like Ben Franklin or something
0:16.0	Hey
0:18.0	Oh nevermind false alarm. Oh, what did you think was happening? I thought someone made eye contact with me?
0:24.0	Oh my gosh, that is a toxic workplace environment
0:31.0	So you'd better be good for goodness sake, but that wasn't good enough for you wasn't you still had to lie to your mommy
0:39.9	You still had to steal you still had to not be good to your teachers and now you get cold
1:00.8	Oh
1:02.8	Hi, hi, hi, they're human. I'm God and this is the God pod the God pod is a twice weekly show where I the Lord thy God
1:12.0	Interview author scientists to millions and more I also discuss all the latest current events
1:17.7	Find the God pod wherever you get your podcasts the God pod have it y'all way we're making cartoons now and we've got a
1:26.8	Discord server that you can jump on and chat with your fellow fans of the God pod links to that are all in the show notes of every episode of the God pod
1:36.6	And that's also where you can ask your questions and leave your feedback on the show and we read it all in the air
1:42.8	Let's meet my co-host today
1:45.4	Jesus Christ and Santa Claus Santa
1:49.4	Oh
1:51.4	Oh, I miss that hoe and I'm here to tell you all about the
1:57.6	Public domain Christmas songs we can sing on the show
2:03.8	I love it welcome back Santa. It's been like a year. We wish you a Merry Christmas. That's in the public domain
2:12.0	Perfect, so we're gonna sing that for the next hour. Don't forget jingle bells
2:16.4	Oh
	...

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