From Complaining to Collaboration: Shifting 1:1 Dynamics 7 | 29

Radical Candor: Communication at Work

Radical Candor

Business, Management, Careers

4.7 • 729 Ratings

🗓️ 16 July 2025

⏱️ 34 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

When your one-on-ones start sounding like therapy sessions with zero breakthroughs, it’s time to ask—what’s really going on here? Jason and Amy unpack a Reddit post from a manager caught in a swirl of venting, defiance, and total burnout from their team. They dive into what venting actually signals, why some people shoot down every idea (even the good ones), and how to rebuild trust when the whole vibe is off. Sometimes it’s not about “fixing” people—it’s about listening like you mean it and why “don’t bring me problems, bring me solutions” might be the most toxic advice you never meant to give. It’s a deep dive into messy middle management moments, complete with hard truths, small wins, and the uncomfortable art of getting unstuck—without just slapping on a smile and pretending everything’s fine. Get all of the show notes at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠RadicalCandor.com/podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Episode Links: Transcript Effective 1:1s - Tips For One-on-One Meetings With Your Team | Radical Candor 7 Ways To Improve One-on-One Meetings | Radical Candor Have More Effective 1:1 Meetings | Radical Candor Podcast 2 | 9 Resistant Direct Reports | Radical Candor Podcast 7 | 8 The Go-To Question | Radical Candor Podcast 2 | 8 Some direct reports have nothing to say during 1-on-1s | Reddit Connect: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠LinkedIn⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Bluesky⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Chapters: (00:00:00) Introduction Jason and Amy introduce a Reddit post about managing one-on-ones that turn into venting sessions. (00:02:35) Complaining vs. Valid Frustration How to treat repeated venting as a signal, not background noise. (00:04:00) The Manager’s Middle Role The challenges of managing from the middle of the org chart. (00:05:12) Listening as a Strategic Tool Why reflective listening helps clarify what really matters to your team. (00:06:33) Soliciting Specific Feedback Effectively Using targeted questions to gather feedback from frustrated reports. (00:09:52)Tailoring Feedback Questions Why not all feedback questions are equal: timing and specificity are key. (00:10:37) Celebrating Small Wins How to acknowledge constraints while celebrating progress. (00:12:17) Shifting from Emotion to Action Encouraging forward motion by focusing on what can be done now. (00:14:19) Managing Venting Time Balancing space to vent with the need to move forward. (00:17:03) Venting Culture & Peer Influence How one person’s negativity can shape the entire team dynamic. (00:19:01) Manipulative Insincerity & Unmet Needs Understanding venting as a shortcut to connection and belonging. (00:20:35) “Don’t Bring Me Problems” – Helpful or Harmful? Why banning complaints can backfire—and what to do instead. (00:22:14) The Roleplay: Shooting Down Every Idea A roleplay showing how to respond when every idea gets shot down. (00:27:00) Solutions Without Overpromising How to be honest about constraints without losing trust. (00:28:54) Radical Candor Tips Actionable tips to guide productive, empathetic one-on-ones. (00:31:38) Conclusion Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Oh, that's my prime delivery.
0:01.6	What, already?
0:02.7	Only one thing can match the buzz of Prime's fast delivery.
0:06.2	And that's the buzz of Prime's entertainment.
0:09.0	What are we watching?
0:09.7	Heads of state, that new action comedy with Idris Elbert as the Prime Minister,
0:13.3	John Sina as the president, and Prianka Chopra Jonas,
0:15.9	as their only hope.
0:17.0	It looks like a blast.
0:18.3	From fast delivery to explosive entertainment, it's's on prime for only 899 a month
0:24.2	join now content includes limited ads subscription or to renews for more information go to amazon.com.
0:28.8	u.k slash prime hello everybody and welcome to the radical cand Candor podcast. I'm Jason Rosoff.
0:40.2	I'm Amy Sandler. Today we're going to be tackling a situation many managers will recognize,
0:46.1	which is what do you do when your one-on-ones with your team turn into venting sessions
0:51.6	and your ideas are met with resistance and maybe even defiance. So I wanted
0:58.0	to share with you a question that we stumbled across on Reddit, quote, some direct reports
1:04.5	have nothing to say during one-on-ones. All they do is vent about the leadership above me. I've been in this role for one and a half
1:12.6	years. I've offered all kinds of support, gallop style everything, but they're defiant to every
1:20.0	idea I propose. One person even got fired after turning against my supervisor. What else can I do?
1:30.0	Jason, I think before I jump into this,
1:32.4	do you want to just define when they said Gallup style,
1:35.3	what you think may have been on their mind there
	...

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