Football through a pub window, "Sign him up!" and transfer-rumour Photoshopping

For Our Sins: The Clichés Pod Archive

The Athletic

Soccer,, Sports

4.8 • 538 Ratings

🗓️ 23 February 2023

⏱️ 55 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

The Athletic's Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker field February's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, where the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations.

Among the selections are watching football through a pub window, the five specific scenarios that allow you to chant "SIGN HIM UP!", players being photoshopped into the kit of the team trying to sign them and substitutes who creep onto the pitch while they're warming up.

Meanwhile, the Adjudication Panel look ahead to Graeme Le Saux's stand-up comedy debut, enjoy the sons of two Barclays-era names going head to head in the National League and assess an AI-generated vision of the footballing loves and hates of Richard Keys.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	The Athletic.
0:05.2	I'm sorry, you can sit there and look and play with all your silly machines as much as you like.
0:10.4	Is Gas going to have a crack?
0:12.2	He is, you know.
0:13.0	Oh, he fell!
0:15.6	Brilliant!
0:18.8	He's round the goalkeeper!
0:21.1	He's done it!
0:22.8	Absolutely incredible!
0:24.7	He launched himself six feet into the crowd, and Kung Fu kicked a supporter who was eyewit without a shadow of an out giving him lip.
0:35.4	Oh, I say, it's amazing.
0:38.4	It does it tame and tame and tame again.
0:41.4	Frank of the music, charge a glass.
0:45.3	This nation is going to dance all night.
0:49.2	The stolen moment of watching some fleeting football action through someone's window.
0:53.8	The five specific scenarios in which you're permitted to chance sign him up.
0:57.8	Elite players briefly breaking the fourth wall at a throw-in.
1:01.0	Clunky footballing verbs.
1:02.7	Players being photoshopped almost too well into the shirt of a team allegedly trying to sign them.
1:07.5	The perilous pit's perimeters of Sunday League substitutes creeping onto the
1:11.4	field of play and the underreported erasure of first half injury time.
1:16.4	Brought to your ears by the Athletic, this is football clichés and your Mezzart Harland Dix.
	...

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