Hey everyone, before we begin, I just want to remind you to please check out my new

No Bad Kids Master course.

You can find out all about it at nobadkidscourse.com.

Hi, this is Janet Landsfari, and in this episode of Unruffled, I'm going to respond to

a question from a mom whose efforts to establish limits with her 10-month-old are not really

having the desired effect.

To say the least, it's really all about her tone, so in this episode I'm going to try

to help this mom and others figure out how to nail the tone.

Before I begin, just a quick reminder that both of my books are available on audio at audible.com

and in paperback, an ebook at Amazon, Barnes & Noble and Apple.

So here's the note Lauren wrote to me.

Hi Janet, I've been practicing rye with my 10-month-old on a regular basis.

I've also been setting limits with the definitive tone you suggest.

But recently he's been laughing when I say no, especially when he pulls my hair.

I say no very sternly and he starts giggling.

Any suggestions?

Okay, so first of all, I feel a bit remiss in that I might not have been clear in my writing.

I think the words that I use often are confident and firm and I've noticed that people misinterpret

that a bit for stern.

Stern is in a frowed brow and very serious expression.

Something a bit more forced than I'm trying to suggest.

So I'm sorry if I've given that impression.

...