February 2, 2009 – Part 1

TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live

TBTL

Comedy, Leisure

4.8 • 2.4K Ratings

🗓️ 2 February 2009

⏱️ 41 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Welcome to the show: a roller party post-mortem. Plus, is Groundhog Day real?

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hey, Gafret, you're the son of TVTL, the show that just by beach you do the whole thing.
0:08.4	I just had some thoughts that I wanted to share with you people.
0:12.0	Jim, you're 6'11".
0:14.4	Anyway, 90 pounds. Gumby has a better body than you.
0:18.0	Boom, roasted. Dwight, you're a kiss ass. Boom, roasted.
0:21.8	Pam, you failed art school. Boom, roasted. Meredith.
0:25.8	You slept with so many guys, you're starting to look like one.
0:28.8	Boom, roasted.
0:29.8	Kevin, I can't decide between a fat joke and a dumb joke. Boom, roasted.
0:33.4	Creed, your teeth called. Your breast stinks. Boom, roasted.
0:36.4	Angela, where's Angela?
0:38.4	Well, there you are. I didn't see you behind that grain of rice.
0:41.6	Boom, roasted. Stanley, you crushed your wife during sex and your heart sucks.
0:46.6	Boom, roasted. Oscar, you're gay. Andy, Cornell, call. They think you suck.
0:51.6	And you're gay or the Oscar?
0:54.6	Boom, roasted.
0:58.0	And, roasted. Welcome to a Monday Night edition of TBTL.
1:02.2	The show that's probably too beautiful to live. Boom, roasted.
1:06.4	I'm your host, Luke Burbank.
1:08.8	Wanging it 190. 0.5 pounds. Boom, roasted.
1:14.2	See, the problem, Jennifer, is that I grew up one of seven children. Boom, roasted.
1:22.2	And there was never enough foodstuffs to go around.
	...

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