My mom recently told me, she said, uh...

Honey, when you don't wear makeup, you look mentally ill.

So now I go home and certain to her thick green eyes, shadow, and a line of lipstick around my lips.

Baby, look pretty now, mommy!

T-B-T-L!

Well, hello there, America!

Welcome to a Friday afternoon edition of T-B-T-L.

It's the show. It's probably too beautiful to live.

I'm your host, Luke Perbank.

Uh, not sure what I'm weighing in at today.

I can tell you that my decision to, uh, have the cab driver take me through the drive-through of McDonald's.

At about 3.30 this morning.

That cannot be helping.

On the other hand, I was able to, uh, receive an informational tract from him about the Harry Krishna faith.

So, uh, that's a win.

And, of course, I showed him my gratitude by buying him a large sprite.

I'm still looking at the, uh, McDonald's bag, uh, over on a little table here in the hotel room in Chicago.

And, uh, they're pointing out that they do, in fact, offer free Wi-Fi.

And I just thought...

For the business person who's also trying to destroy their aorta.

McDonald's, now with free Wi-Fi.

Um, this is, uh, episode, uh, 756 of memory serves.

...