Fast Questions for Bob #3
Psychology In Seattle Podcast
Kirk Honda
4.6 • 1.2K Ratings
🗓️ 16 August 2021
⏱️ 92 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | So Bob, I have a bunch of questions that you and I are going to answer. What do you say? |
| 0:03.7 | That's answer one of them. So this is from the survey that I sent out asking people to submit |
| 0:08.6 | questions for you and me to answer. Is there ever a time when an extra marital affair can be justified? |
| 0:15.6 | Bob, what do you think? No, but this word justified, I'm this the thing, is like what are you saying? |
| 0:21.8 | Are you saying where what it's street legal or it's sanctioned by or the other the other person |
| 0:27.3 | in the relationship should therefore be okay with it? Or are you saying you wish there not to be |
| 0:34.6 | a negative consequence of the thing or like a moral thing? You know, I'm not sure what the word |
| 0:44.4 | means. Right. Yeah, I would say generally no and as a therapist, I don't kind of make |
| 0:53.4 | I don't make those judgments anymore. Yeah. Yeah. But as a citizen, I have, you know, |
| 1:00.0 | friends that will tell me situations where they cheated while they were in like an abusive |
| 1:06.2 | relationship, for example. Yeah. And although it's not a good thing to cheat, it's understandable. |
| 1:12.6 | To understand. On some level, if you're being in a high control relationship and you feel like |
| 1:17.1 | you can't get out and you're beaten down and you're terrified and you come across someone who |
| 1:23.5 | likes you and you have some level of an affair with that person. It's not a good thing to deceive, |
| 1:30.1 | it's not a good thing. It's slightly self-destructive and potentially, but I wouldn't necessarily |
| 1:36.2 | fault someone for that. But yeah, the vast majority of time when people are cheating, it's immoral, |
| 1:42.2 | it's wrong. It can come from a place where we might be able to conceptualize it like, |
| 1:47.2 | oh, the marriage is going downhill or you have attachment injuries from the past that are being |
| 1:52.9 | displaced on your current relationship. But it never justifies it. It's a deceptive act and |
| 1:59.2 | it takes a lot of tiny decisions to conduct an affair. People often, the people having |
| 2:07.7 | affairs will often frame it as, I don't know, it just sort of happened. It's like, no, it didn't. |
| 2:11.4 | You made probably literally 3,000 little decisions. You came to 3,000 whys in the road and you chose |
... |
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