How do you pass up the opportunity to spit blood and Joan Baez's face?

I've read Mark Twain. I've read Huckleberry Finn. I think I earned the right to go out the internet and see that guy get a chainsaw on the face. Dude, my dad was drunk and my mom was dealing with it. Guess what? I get raised by cookie monster.

My con looks like it's been in a hockey flage. Time my stupidity. It's at the speed of goddamn light. I got a bunch of the clocks.

Hey, what's happened?

I'm Mike Schmidt, 40-year-old boy podcast.

Let me ask you a question, folks.

Now, before I ask that question, let me preface this by saying you don't need to answer that question.

Certainly not out loud, you might look like a maniac if you're on public transportation, although we've covered that in the past,

where I've had you take up your shirts and yell how much you love me and you're in my army.

And if you're alone in a car, feel free to answer, or if you're alone at home, if you're listening to this at a desk,

just say, let's just say this, just like you're somebody who broke their ankle, and their significant other,

Sal is somewhere else doing something and you're alone. You got nothing

else to do? Feel free to answer this question out. Or go ahead and text that, Sal. Or go ahead and

text somebody else, anybody else, to answer this question. My point is I have a question to ask you,

folks. And it pertains to me, it pertains to you, it pertains to all of us. Well, maybe not all of us.

I want to go ahead and exclude maybe half of the population. That seems weird right off the bat, right? Why would you do something like that?

Why would you cut half the population immediately out of an inquiry? If I'm taking a poll of some sort,

I'm trying to find an answer. Why would I immediately take half of the population out of the

equation? I would think that I would need to get a true read by talking to everybody. And yet, once I ask the question, you'll understand

exactly why I'm taking out half the population. About half the population, I mean a certain

amount of the population. It doesn't have to be half, but only certain members of the population.

You know what I'm cutting out? The Amish? I don't want to hear from the Amish. You Amish,

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