I'm coming for all of you.

For all of you.

For all of you.

Right now there's a 15-year-old sophomore in high school who has no idea they're studying nursing just so they can wipe my ass in 17 years.

I'm 50 and single.

That's a fantastic combination.

I'm going to spend my golden years dating a handful of spit and a jug of astrobiide.

Hey, what's happening at Mike Schmidt, 40-year-old boy podcast?

Folks, I'm a fragile soul.

I'm not going to lie to you.

I'm that guy who's kind of tentative.

I'm a coin flip at all times.

You never know which way I'm going to lean, which way the wind blows and how it makes

me happen.

First of all, let's talk about this. I'm the, uh, I'm the very major model of a modern miracle of modern science.

That's a lot of M's. Um, because I want to say this now, my friend Murray Valeriano, if you don't

know him, you should. He's the host of the Road Stories podcast. Also, the sometimes co-host on the

Rock Solid podcast. That's a weird setup they got over there. They got Pat Francis hosting the thing. You got Kyle producing the thing. And then you got a rotating chair of guest hosts.

You got an Apey and a Christie and a Murray and a Mikey.

Dare I call Mike Siegel Mikey?

I try it because there's a lot of Wies in those other names.

But then if that's the case, I've got to go with Patty.

...