So for me, golf is a lot like a woman.

How?

Well, if she isn't holding my wood, she should be holding an iron.

Sorry, ladies, I love you really, and I respect you.

When a reality, you've only got to put her. Greetings, salutations and felicitations.

Hello, everybody.

Felicity Kendall.

Mmm, yummy, milf.

Was that the one from The Good Life?

Yes, it was.

I'll tell you what, even covered in pig shit, she was beautiful.

She was beautiful.

She was a hot mama.

You just know that them and the neighbours, they entered they entered swinging weren't they they got the old car keys jingle jangling

in a part i reckon you think i was a bit too young to be having those sort of thoughts

but on reflection i think you're probably right probably am welcome to midlife game of podcast

by the way.

Down and Matt here in the house, ready for another rip-roaring show. And I guess we need to reveal something.

This is our first dry show.

There is no alcohol in the house whatsoever.

Matthew has gone through some sort of process of self-cleansing. Are you going for the colonic irrigation as well? Dude, my body's a temple. Because I know you got a bit shocked the other way, didn't you, when you wade yourself around at your parents' house. Dude, body is so tall. You can't even buy your own set of scales. You just go out to your moms and eat a Sunday dinner and then try and have a big dump before you get on the scales.

But yeah, you've lost £5 this week, mate.

...