We are all human. We make a lot of mistakes. We are not perfect.

And so we have to give our partners that same grace that we would want them to give to us.

Hello and welcome to the Pillow Talks podcast.

We're your host Vanessa and Sandra Marin.

I'm a sex therapist with 20 years of experience and I'm just a regular dude.

We share the ups and downs in our relationship while giving you step-by-step techniques for improving yours.

So make sure to subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips,

practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind

closed bedroom doors and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you'd have.

Today we are talking about I think one of the most popular topics that we have ever talked about.

Yeah definitely. Other than how to clean up after sex that also was a surprisingly popular topic.

Unexpectedly popular. So today we are talking about mental load. Yeah we did a few posts about

mental load on Instagram and people went bonkers. I think so many people don't even know the

phrase mental load and when they finally heard it described it like just set off light bulbs

and people's heads. Oh my god I didn't realize this was a thing. Yeah it feels very validating once

you understand what it is. If you are someone that you will find out carries a load of mental load.

Yeah so we will get into a much bigger definition of what mental load is and how it comes up in

relationships but the basic idea is that mental load is the mental energy that it takes to keep

track of all of the many moving parts of life and mental load is something that you know it feels

bad to just carry it on your own but it can have a huge impact on your relationship making it feel

like you and your partner are opponents rather than teammates. Always contributing to this

sense of like things aren't being fair. We're keeping track, keeping score of who's doing what?

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