Episode 333: Finding Your Peace as a Parent (and Finding Your No, too) with Enneagram 9’s, Hillary Rector & Andy Gullahorn

Raising Boys & Girls

That Sounds Fun Network

Religion & Spirituality, Kids & Family, Christianity, Parenting

4.9 • 1.9K Ratings

🗓️ 11 December 2025

⏱️ 66 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Hillary Rector and Andy Gullahorn share an honest, thoughtful look at what it’s like to move through the world—and parent—as Enneagram Nines. They discuss the genuine ease, adaptability, and steady presence that come naturally to them, along with the quieter struggles: delayed emotions, difficulty voicing desires, and the instinct to “smooth the ice” for everyone around them. Their stories highlight both the gentleness and complexity of this peaceful number. Hillary and Andy reflect on how their nine-ness shapes their parenting—helping them create a calm, grounded environment, while also challenging them to build clearer boundaries, name their needs, and show their kids a more defined sense of self. They offer practical insight for supporting nine children, encouraging parents to give them time, space, and gentle opportunities to speak up and step in. It’s a compassionate, warm conversation for anyone who loves a nine or is raising one. If you liked this episode, we think you’ll probably like: Episode 121: Storing Up Good Memories for Your Kids with Hillary and Ben Rector Episode 18: Using the Enneagram to Understand and Parent Kids and Adolescents . . . . . . Sign up to receive the⁠ bi-⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠monthly newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to keep up to date with where David and Sissy are speaking, where they are taco'ing, PLUS conversation starters for you and your family to share! Access Raising Boys and Girls courses here! Connect with David, Sissy, and Melissa at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠raisingboysandgirls.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠Owen Learns He Has What it Takes: A Lesson in Resilience⁠ ⁠Lucy Learns to Be Brave: A Lesson in Courage⁠⁠ . . . . . . If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form. A special thank you to our sponsors: QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns. THRIVE MARKET: Head over to ⁠ThriveMarket.com/rbg⁠ to get 30% off your first order and a FREE $60 gift. NIV APPLICATION BIBLE: Save an additional 10% on any NIV Application Bible and NIV Application Commentary Resources by visiting faithgateway.com/nivab and using promo code RBG. MERCY SHIPS: Please donate today at MercyShips.org/podcast. OMAHA STEAKS: Visit OmahaSteaks.com for 50% off sitewide during their Sizzle All the Way Sale. And for an extra $35 off, use promo code FUN at checkout. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Think about cheese.
0:02.1	Make your thoughts cheesier.
0:04.2	Now add 100% chicken breast fillet,
0:06.3	Chipotle sauce and Amadea cheese melt.
0:08.3	And it's giving the new cheesy chicken stack at McDonald's.
0:12.0	Did we mention it's cheesy?
0:13.9	Cheese.
0:15.8	Availments at the 4th of Jan, 2026 from 11am.
0:18.1	Plus and participation may vary.
0:19.2	Subjects availability. Hey, friends.
0:30.1	Welcome to the Raising Boys and Girls podcast.
0:32.5	I'm Sissy Goff.
0:33.6	And I'm David Thomas,
0:34.8	and we're so glad you've joined us for this conversation. Let's dive in.
0:45.9	We have been counting down to this episode, one, because we love this number so much.
0:52.5	Two, because we love the two of you so much.
0:54.7	Yes.
0:55.9	And I have a question we've not asked any of the other eight numbers.
1:00.7	Ooh.
1:01.1	Oh, whoa.
1:02.1	For this reason, we're going to start with if we could.
1:05.4	How often has someone said to you over the course of your journey, I wish I was a nine.
	...

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