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Your Kickstarter Sucks

Episode 314: Cookies On The Go

Your Kickstarter Sucks

Jesse Farrar & Mike Hale

Technology, Comedy

4.81.6K Ratings

🗓️ 31 July 2023

⏱️ 113 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Hey free coffee…want any? Yeah, it does suck! Thanks for letting us use this in our commercial!! ← Do you think this scenario could really happen? Well, the boys at YKS don’t, and that’s why they came out with Episode 314 of the program, and not any other contractual, financial, or sheer inertia-based reasons! On today’s show we’re doing a very short and unsatisfying investigation into how fruit flies pork each other, and yes of course buttwiping technology returns as a focal point of the conversation as well. Plus we’re talking old man hobbies, kissing the computer, and rats with PTSD. Do YOU think you can take down the evil Dr. Divisor with your power of exponent multiplicity? Then put it to the test…it’s an all-new YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. 

YKS Premium! THAT’S what I wanted to talk about. On last Friday’s YKS Premium, we went out to the…movies! In the middle of a movie month?!! Yep, we’re just that crazy. But there was no better way to introduce our newest series, Limited Engagement, where we see the stuff even the movie theater isn’t that excited about. Plus we ate some crap you wouldn’t feed a dog. Next week, we conclude Beach Party 2 with a “radical” throwback…Point Break (one of em)! 

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands

Athletic Greens - Vitamins are sooooo good. But everyone wants to eat them. I say drink them, and get some adaptogens to boot! A slightly tropical flavor is just icing on the cake. Get 5 free travel packs and a year supply of Vitamin D at AthleticGreens.com/YKS.

Fast Growing Trees - Ferns. Apple Tree. Olive…branch? Those are just some of the wonderful things that grow on this earth, and doubtless also things I could kill without expert support and guidance. That’s where Fast Growing Trees comes in. So, let’s all put some stuff in the ground, in the good way! Get 15% off your order at FastGrowingTrees.com/YKS.



See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Yeah, that's right. They're still making your Kickstarter sucks. Yeah, Mike and Che

0:10.0

I'm still doing this stuff. They've been going for six years and haven't given it up.

0:14.5

So somehow here's another six pack of this type of junk. Yeah, that's right. We're still doing these.

0:19.5

Kickstarter sucks. Yeah, that's right. We're still doing these. Yeah, Mike and Che have haven't given this up.

0:26.0

Yeah, that's right. Still doing your Kickstarter sucks.

0:32.0

This message is about Lizard's kit and episode 78. Getting that out of the way now.

0:37.5

So Jesse can read that on the voice to text immediately. But I did go back and I've been listening to episode 78 today.

0:45.5

And you were talking about diapers for lizards. And I remember when I heard this the first time I laughed because

0:53.5

that was a funny bark. And since then I've gotten up here to drag in and they take the biggest,

1:03.5

wettest, dankest shit you could possibly imagine. I don't know how on a fucking diet and crickets

1:12.5

with not much juice in them. And without drinking much water, this guy is dehydrated.

1:18.5

He should be taken and just like Dan, but instead he's got fucking two bombs.

1:24.5

So anyway, it makes me want to go and buy those those bikers.

1:30.5

Yeah, okay.

1:34.5

Hey, everybody welcome to my KS. Don't forget to call us number one while you're walking around the house,

1:39.5

shutting all your doors or whatever the fuck is going on there. And also to let us know what you think Dan's poops look like.

1:45.5

Welcome to show JF here. Mike over there. Michael. What's going on, buddy?

1:50.5

What's up? What is up? What?

1:54.5

What's going on? Oh my God. Beautiful. Beautiful.

2:00.5

Yeah, weather outside on this nice Friday. What day is this Friday?

2:05.5

Yeah, it's Friday.

2:08.5

It's Friday. It really is. I've been saying it that way for God.

...

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