Welcome to Deadcast, a podcast taking you through the week of sports lunacy. Here are Deadspin,

editor-in-chief Tim Marchman and columnist Drew McGarry. Welcome back. Welcome back to the Deadcast,

everybody, where every week we prove that talking is harder than writing. It's me, Drew, and I'm with

Marchman. Marchmanman say hi to everybody.

Hey, what's up, everyone?

We have a couple of improvements that we need to get into for this deadcast. Someone told us

that Marchman and I need to stop agreeing during the dead cast. Marchman, would you agree

on that? Fuck you, man.

That's the spirit.

I like it.

It's a whole new world.

One reader also told us to stop ad-libbing during the podcast.

So I'd like that reader to know that today's podcast has been scripted by Oscar-winning screenwriter Akiva Goldsman,

so he doesn't have to worry about any sort of ad-libbing or improvisation.

I hope he's happy about that.

A bunch of readers also wrote in and said that Marchman sounds exactly like Krieger from Archer.

So I have provided Marchman with a list of quotes from the Krieger character.

The Marchman will now read now to you as Krieger for your enjoyment.

Are you ready, Marchman?

Read the quote. Yeah, I should just say I've never seen Archer.

I saw a lot of people saying I sounded like Archer, so I checked it out on YouTube.

I don't hear any similarity,

...