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TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live

Episode #2674: …And Helmets!

TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live

TBTL

Comedy, Leisure

4.82.4K Ratings

🗓️ 2 July 2018

⏱️ 81 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Luke is about to go on a hike with the fam, and he needs some dog-related advice. Plus, a newspaper write-up about TBTL has Andrew scratching his head. And David From The Basement swings by to talk a little Mariners and Seahawks in a special episode of No Point Conversion!

Transcript

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0:00.0

This is about consumer rights, and if they don't want to drink our delicious sodas, we do provide healthier options, like water zero.

0:08.0

Oh, yes, let's talk about water zero. The name implies that there are zero calories, like most water, but in fact, it has 300 calories per serving.

0:18.0

Isn't that misleading? The zero on the label refers to the amount of water in it, which is zero. If you want zero calorie water, try diet water zero light.

0:28.0

It has only 60 calories.

0:36.0

WWW dot this, and WWW dot that. Let's WWW dot explain it.

0:41.0

I keep losing it, geez. And I don't want to make it there anymore.

0:45.0

So tired of you getting angry and yelling all the time. It's exhausting. I feel like I'm partners with the Hulk.

0:55.0

This comedian was crazy in the 80s with his raw and delirious routines.

1:00.0

Dead! Oh, he's a hilarious dog. Who is Rick Moranis?

1:03.0

Hey, Johnny. Oh, hi, Danny. What's wrong with Mark? He's cranky today.

1:07.0

All right. Let's toss the ball around.

1:18.0

All right, everybody. Here we go. Here's the pot dog.

1:24.0

She's heard enough of this dribble-drabble for one lifetime. So I've somewhere in the house doing her thing.

1:29.0

That's fine. We're all together on the imaginary radio and ready for a Monday edition of TBTL, the show that just might be too beautiful to live.

1:38.0

Too loud and too specific. My name is Luke Burbank. I'm your host.

1:41.0

You paint your balls, bud. More balls, bud.

1:44.0

Coming to you from the Burbank Springs Broadcast Center, Perch Top Alabama Hill, in Bellingham, Washington, the Bay City, about to settle in for a month or two of shows from the Broadcast Center.

2:02.0

Exciting, exciting times for me.

2:04.0

Being the aspiring recluse that I've become, sit here in this little room, look out on the backyard and talk to all of you, the tens of listeners here on the imaginary radio.

2:17.0

Excited to do that over the course of the next couple of months. It is Episode 2600, excuse me, 2673. That's what I meant to say.

2:28.0

Ooh, in a collector series and we have so much to talk about on this Monday.

2:32.0

Let the fun begin. Including a prison break that just occurred in France. That is insane. It's out of a friggin' Tom Cruise movie, like Rainman, where he helicopters into the prison to liberate Dustin Hoffman.

...

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