Episode 2: Can You Actually Solve Problems In Your Relationship?

Pillow Talks

Vanessa & Xander Marin

Health & Fitness, Sexuality

4.8 • 2.2K Ratings

🗓️ 10 June 2021

⏱️ 51 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Has this phrase ever been uttered in your home: “We’ve talked about this a million times before”?

So many of the arguments we get into with our partners are different versions of the same argument we've already had. And it can feel exhausting and demoralizing to keep having the same conflict over and over.

In today’s episode, we’re introducing you to the concept of unresolvable conflict. According to research, 69% of conflicts in long-term relationships are unresolvable.

What does that even mean? And what are you supposed to do if you can’t resolve a conflict? Tune in to find out!

Get full show notes and resources mentioned in this episode here: www.vmtherapy.com/episode2

GIVEAWAY ALERT!

If you leave us a review on Apple Podcasts before June 20 and we'll enter your name into a drawing to win any one of our courses for free! That’s up to a $1,000 value!

(Just make sure to take a screenshot of your review and DM it to us at @vanessamarintherapy. Apple doesn’t like to show every review, so we want to make sure you get added to the giveaway.)

Thank you in advance for taking the time to leave us a quick review!

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you had!

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	I think one of the issues that a lot of couples get into when they have conflict is it feels like
0:04.9	one person's right and one person's wrong. We're very used to seeing the world
0:09.3	kind of in a black and white way and especially around conflict most of us are uncomfortable with it
0:14.2	and it just feels sort of easier to put it in this framework of someone's right and someone's wrong.
0:18.8	Hello and welcome to the Pillow Talks podcast. We're your host, Vanessa. And Sandra Marin.
0:31.0	I'm a sex therapist with 20 years of experience and I'm just a regular dude. We share the ups and
0:36.8	downs in our relationship while giving you step-by-step techniques for improving yours.
0:41.9	So make sure to subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips,
0:46.7	practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed
0:52.4	bedroom doors and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you'd have.
1:03.6	Tell me if this is something you have heard in your household. We've talked about this a million
1:10.1	times. Oh yeah. I am. It's your heart rate starting to go up a little bit. A little bit,
1:16.9	a little bit. Yeah I mean this is something I think that most couples struggle with. We definitely
1:22.7	have our version of the conflict that just keeps coming back and back and yeah when you hear those
1:29.8	words you're just like oh shoot this is happening again. Unfortunately in relationships so many of the
1:38.0	conflicts that we have are conflicts that we have over and over and over again. It feels like we're
1:44.0	on this horrible hamster wheel just repeating ourselves having this exact same argument and this
1:49.5	can be incredibly frustrating. It makes you wonder are we ever gonna fix this? Is this what life is
1:55.3	gonna be like for the rest of eternity? Are we even a good fit for each other if we can't solve
2:00.8	these problems? If you've ever thought any of those things that Vanessa just said then we want
2:06.9	to introduce you to the concept of unresolvable conflict. So there's actually a lot of research
2:12.4	on this. John Gottman who's a really well-known psychologist and relationship researcher he found
	...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Vanessa & Xander Marin, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Vanessa & Xander Marin and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.