Episode 186: Healing Together with Figs O'Sullivan
The Hardcore Self-Help Podcast with Duff the Psych
Robert Duff, Ph.D.
4.5 • 1K Ratings
🗓️ 5 December 2019
⏱️ 61 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
This episode is a fantastic interview with master couples therapist, Figs O'Sullivan. We spoke together about many topics related to discord in relationships. Figs believes that many of our issues within relationships come from our deep need for belonging and attachment. Rarely are arguments really about the surface level issue. Once we can admit to being wounded together. We can begin to heal together.
Figs has an app and online course available at empathi.com/go
And if you use the coupon code "hardcore self help" you get 50% off!
I also have a couple sales going on. If you use coupon code "anxiousaf" you can get 30% off my ugly holiday sweaters and other designs in the Duff the Psych shop.
You can also get the Kick Anxiety's Ass course for 50% off through the end of the year. Click here or use the coupon code "holidayhalf".
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | We got to create a safe foundation and that safe foundation is we're in a system we both get hurt we both have reactivity and we both negatively impact the other person and if we can get there first with each other, and by the way, not just cognitively, in our bones, |
| 0:20.0 | in our limbic system, it's almost like a big out breath. |
| 0:23.1 | We stopped seeming like reptiles to each other |
| 0:25.8 | that could hurt each other, and we're just two little field mice |
| 0:28.4 | that are hurting. |
| 0:29.8 | Okay, now we are safe enough to then start to explore. |
| 0:35.6 | What do you think is up with this maladaptive thing |
| 0:38.2 | you do when you're disconnected? |
| 0:40.4 | But if we tried to start with trying to change people's behavior before it's safe |
| 0:46.3 | All we're doing is adding more gasoline to the flame. Hey everybody before we start the show I want to make a couple disclaimers. This show does |
| 0:54.1 | cover a wide variety of topics related to mental health and life in general and some of those |
| 0:58.4 | could be sensitive for you. I want to simultaneously encourage you to be brave in consuming difficult content, but also respect and recognize your limitations. |
| 1:07.0 | So please use your best judgment. I will never be offended if you need to skip a question or an episode entirely but feel free to feel it out |
| 1:14.3 | check out the episode and just see what happens if you need to skip that's okay but you know feel |
| 1:18.4 | free to give it a shot first I also need to say that while I am a psychologist |
| 1:22.4 | I'm not your psychologist psychologist I'm not your therapist. |
| 1:25.0 | This is not intended to be direct medical advice and you should not use this as a |
| 1:29.0 | substitute for professional help. |
| 1:30.0 | So with those said let's go ahead and get into the show. All right. Hello, friends of all Varieties. This is the Hardcore Health |
| 1:53.9 | Health Podcast episode 186. I'm your host Dr. Robert Duff, aka Duff the |
| 1:58.8 | psych. I make mental health content for real people, just like you. and today I have an interview for you |
| 2:03.9 | this interview is with Figs O'Sullivan he is a licensed couples therapist and a |
... |
Please login to see the full transcript.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Robert Duff, Ph.D., and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of Robert Duff, Ph.D. and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.