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The Voices In Our Heads w/ Krystyna Hutchinson

Episode #12 - I'm Nice To Myself

The Voices In Our Heads w/ Krystyna Hutchinson

Krystyna Hutchinson

Comedy

4.8964 Ratings

🗓️ 18 December 2019

⏱️ 67 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

You didn't kill yourself, hooray! We continue with the weird-o vibe on today's episode of The Voices In Our Heads and I've added a little Mucinex to the mix. Turns out, that shit makes you goofy. Enjoy some fun life advice, hear about adventures in not stealing from CVS, what I've witnessed in the mouths of pigeons that are far worse than a scone and the lovely emotional dance one experiences while watching a documentary about Jeffrey Dahmer on Hulu when you didn't pay for the commercial-free version. Plus! A surprise appearance by a roach, Fuckboi Theater and a new segment I just invented where I smoke a little and prank call a major corporation's customer service line. Wow, what a day, huh? For tickets to see me live as well as references for each episode, visit: www.KrystynaHutchinson.com You wanna follow me on social media? Ok, it's: @KrystynaHutch You wanna email me? Alright, fine it's: [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Some days are terrible. You wish that you were dead and some days are magical like

0:06.8

great banana bread. Someday we'll be friends with the voices in our heads the voices in our heads in our heads

0:17.0

Hey God you didn't kill yourself.

0:22.6

That's so great.

0:24.1

How you doing?

0:25.1

Welcome to the voices in our heads.

0:28.1

You girl, Christina Marie Hutchinson, that's K-R-Y-S-T-Y-N-A, why, you say?

0:37.1

I don't fucking know.

0:38.1

A lady my mom went, met once in her life, suggested it,

0:41.5

and my mom goes okay so that's the story that I'm

0:47.5

I'm sick if you can't hear it this is gonna be such a weird episode. I'm acting, first of all, I'm alone in my home.

0:57.0

I'm acting like there's people staring at me, like I'm at, but in a good way not like a scary

1:03.2

schizophrenic way in a way that's like I'm in front I'm on stage but it's because I'm

1:08.9

hopped up on musin X yo I totally get why Walter White was making this shit into meth because I mean I'm pretty

1:19.2

sure it's the musin eggs it's making me a little funky It's like a little like loose, a

1:24.2

loosey-goosey. I'm sober. Well no I'm not I'm on musin eggs I can't even say that.

1:29.1

But let me tell you something. These puff plus withion I'm swear to God I'm so

1:35.2

over I'm just so giggle giggly these puff plus with lotion I'm gonna blow

1:42.3

in it to demonstrate I just have to blow my nose and I'm going to blow in to demonstrate I just have to blow my nose and I'm not going to pause because I'm too lazy one second guys

1:48.6

That wasn't too bad, but let me tell you these puff plus

1:56.9

These got mad lotion on them. I put these up to my nose and I feel like I'm snorting meth

2:01.2

I feel the viele it says puffs plus with vicks. Ugh, men are so such babies when they're sick.

...

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